St Kilda, Melbourne
After a month or two exploring the gorgeous deserted beauty of South Island, New Zealand I and my slightly poorly GF flew into Melbourne. Arriving at 2am back into the filthy, polluted (relative to pristine NZ) car choked bustling urban environment was a bit of a culture shock. All we wanted to do was get to the hotel, shower and sleep. As we were arriving in the middle of the night I had booked a modest dirt cheap but not the cheapest hotel based on the Lonely Planet reviews in the lively, "former" red light district of St Kilda.

After finally locating the hotel (the taxi drove past it twice as it looked derelict) we wearily entered. It appeared to have gone downhill somewhat since the lonely planet reviewed it (probably in about 1979). The smell of damp was overpowering as the night porter stared at me blankly through pin prick pupils for a few seconds, before his comfortably numb brain seemed to drift into gear - "Yip, we've got a room, how long do you want it for and pay up front!". I decided that reminding him that I had 'phoned through my credit card details was a bad idea and after parting with thirty bicks me and the missus (of the time) carried our humungous rucksacks up threadbare stairs and along endless dim Scooby Doo corridors.

Then we got to the room.

The window was open, but hadn’t dispersed the “musty” miasma, there was a square of red carpet on the floor and in the breeze fluttered a thin sheet by way of a curtain. The sheet was decorated with hearts and funky Comic Sans slogans like "spank me", "kiss me", "Oh!" etc., all glaringly backlit by the streetlight directly outside. A battered brass bed dominated the room. We didn’t dare look for stains – we slept in our sleeping bags! We were gone the next morning to the YHA which was lovely. Apparently my GF had been kept awake all night by strange noises and the fear of nocturnal visitations.

I slept like a log ;o)
(jmaxi returned again on, Fri 18 Jan 2008, 13:39, 4 replies)

A perfect example
of pulling an Enzyme...
( Cawl, Fri 18 Jan 2008, 13:59, closed)

^Yessssss!^

( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 18 Jan 2008, 14:16, closed)

I'm done
masturbating your ego now, though :P
( Cawl, Fri 18 Jan 2008, 14:26, closed)

St Kilda.
I go there quite a lot. Fishing then a few pints in the "Esspy".

Lovely place and hideously expensive these days.
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Fri 18 Jan 2008, 23:43, closed)