I am not a twunt.
This one is quite recent, I love synchronicity.

I was walking along the main road to my favourite local pub to enjoy an enjoyable afternoon of beer and funny stories. This pub is great, (a "Samuel Smiths" if you are familiar with the brewery), I have never seen a fight or so much as a cross word in this pub, full of lovely (mainly) middle-aged people whom have lead interesting and lovely lives.

I can't stress this lovelyness too much, this is a twunt-free pub.

Anyway.

As I approach the pub's front door there is a young lad about 15 -16 standing about 3 yards away from the door. He is drinking from a bottle of coke, but he is not actually drinking it. Instead he takes a mouthfull, turns his head upwards and spits, making a cola fountain all over his face.

"Hmmm!" I think.

Then as I pass him, he takes a mouthfull, and spits it at me. It doesn't hit me but goes in my direction.

I cant remember my EXACT words, but they were something like "If you want a bit more brain-damage, you going the right way about it, you fucking retarded piece of piss." (or something very similar.)

He just grins and starts his cola fountain trick again.

2 milli -seconds later, his dad (presumably) comes thru the front door and says "Come-on Daniel, you can't be out here by yourself."

Daniel (Mr Cola fountain) says "mmmmokay," and staggers into the pub in a very, very, VERY brain-damaged-from-birth-type of gait.

Yes! I had called a 15 year kid whom suffers from brain damaged "a retarded piece of piss."

I did not feel very proud of myself.

Don't click "I like this " just give me abuse for being a part time twunt.

Length? I felt smaller than his coke bottle.
(smells-like-victory-v's, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 15:45, 2 replies)

Yeah but,
Not like you knew!
I was expecting you to hit the bugger.
( elgordo, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 16:24, closed)

Insulting a young lad with special needs?
It's not big, and it's not clever..what?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 3 Dec 2008, 15:43, closed)