Two for one
When my brother was deployed to Iraq, I sent him care packages all the time. One of the things he needed for his unit was condoms--put over the barrel, the condom keeps sand out of the firing mechanism.

I'm at the checkout with a box of 144 Trojans and the cashier raises her eyebrows. Now this woman is Deaf; I know her and try to explain in sign language why I need a gross of condoms. She just keeps smiling and nodding, the Deaf equivalent of "Pull the other one, it's got bells on". By now, everyone around is staring at us, wondering what going on with the flaily woman and the weiner wraps.

Finally in exasperation, I say aloud so she can read my lips, "They are for my brother!

Then I died.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 18:14, 5 replies)

In Vietnam
the soldiers were issued loads of condoms for that same reason- to keep the barrel clear of crud. You didn't even need to remove them before you fired.

Someone got the idea of getting some made for the cannons as well, for the same reason. They arrived in boxes marked "Prophylactics- Medium."
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 2 Dec 2008, 18:18, closed)

Medium Prophylactics
Medium, eh? Of COURSE they were from America!
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 21:19, closed)

Sounds like the military
Hope your brother came back safe & sound - x.

When I was at college I worked at the local Army Training Regiment in the bar and, sometimes, in the shop.

Most of the recruits there were 16/17-20 and rather green. Going out on exercise they were told to stock up on Mars Bars (for the sugar boost), tights (to help keen the legs warm - apparently) and sanitary towels (to prevent the Bergen rubbing their shoulders raw).

Made me chuckle!
(Penguins_Made_Me_Do_It is a dolt ... and she don't care, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 18:24, closed)

He was ok in the end
An incendiary device was tossed into his driver's lap, who chucked it out the window at once. After that, they drove around with the windows rolled up in the HMMV.

He has some grit in his face and hip from explosions, but nothing crippling. He's embarrassed about getting a Purple Heart for it and won't tell anyone.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 21:22, closed)

Reminds me
of chickenlady's post about the Isle of Sheppey. A virgin there is someone who can run faster than their sibling.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 3 Dec 2008, 9:35, closed)