I've worked on a number of different customer service helpdesks throughout my colourful career
I've recieved calls from nutters, weirdos and perverts - some days it's like working for the Samaritans, a sex line and a mental health charity all at once.

I remember one call very well - I was speaking to a young lad, who, to put it politely, sounded a few jihads short of a holy war. He talked in slow motion, and didn't really seem to take in anything I said. He had dropped his phone and broken it - I explained three times that accidental damage wasn't covered under warranty, then I had to explain what a 'warranty' was, then I had to give examples of what constituted 'accidental damage,' with the cust chipping in helpfully, "So, if I dropped it in the bath, would that be accidental damage? What if I was on the swings and it fell out my pocket?"

I was being as polite and patient as I could, but with each ridiculous question my jaw was getting tighter and tighter.

Having eventually established that we wouldn't be able to repair the phone free of charge, he said, "But when the guy upgraded my phone, he said I was a special customer" and without even thinking about it I blurted out, "Well, you certainly sound a bit 'special.' Now then..."
(Pavlov's Frog figures no-one really reads sigs anyway, Thu 4 Sep 2008, 23:08, 1 reply)

sounds like a guy
that used to come to the cinema I worked in - often.

He was a tad special though. More on him later.
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Thu 4 Sep 2008, 23:19, closed)