Ooh one for me...
I work for a big supermarket chain in one of its small quick format store with a petrol station of a big oil company attached. It is in a fairly well to do area thats is also inhabitat by chavs so I get my share of crap from twats of all classes, so here are quick tips to make your shopping trip nicer and quicker for everybody concerned. I could go on for ages but these are my pet hates:
- When drawing fuel, from picking up the noozle to the fuel flowing takes a little time for it to happen we have to authorise in the kiosk, during this time we have check your age, that your not going to blow everybody up and what your filling up, plus the we are often serving customers at the same time, therefore waving your arms about like a mong does not speed the process because your too impatient, hell we may even make you wait longer.
-Get it through your skull, stay off your mobile whilst drawing fuel, concentrate on the job in hand, I have heard all the sermons before about it's not dangerous blah blah, its the rule, deal with it or fuck off.
-We are only human and therefore we will make mistakes, tell us and we will usually sort it with no fuss, being rude will just makes you a wanker.
-If your using a debit/credit card, if they work great, if they don't, don't blame me, call your bank, twat.
-If you smell, please don't be offended if I back away.
-You look under 21 I WILL ID you, I don't give a shit about you or any social event I may have ruined. My life will be made misery in so many different ways if I sell underage as happened to two friends of mine. If it keeps happening to you, get ID Dumb Arse.
-5p off a litre won't be accepted here, that fact is cleverly in black and white on the coupon, read it Fool before drawing fuel.
However, If there is a hot girl in the Q for the tills, it is not uncommon for the speed of it to increase considerably. The speed is in proportion how many blokes there are serving.
Be friendly and polite it will usually be returned, I don't particularly enjoy my job, it is not what I want in career, but good customers can brighten a dull day and it is so much more pleasant for everybody!
(KavyMan Living on the ceiling, no more room down there..., Sat 6 Sep 2008, 21:27, 6 replies)

question..
is that true everywhere? about you having to authorise the fuel flowing? It always takes bloody ages for me..
(europe-who, Sat 6 Sep 2008, 23:18, closed)

Of course...
Yep it has to be, with the stupidity of alot of the population it is a damn good thing too!
(KavyMan Living on the ceiling, no more room down there..., Sat 6 Sep 2008, 23:51, closed)

I had many good years as a young Dirty Weeker working at a Petrol station.

Yes some people were cunts, one guy actually took off after filling up and we literally had to chase him to get his number plate! Luckily there were 3 of us that day so someone could stay behind and man the defences.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Sun 7 Sep 2008, 12:19, closed)

About the phone
Is it just while you're actually taking fuel out? As I was on my mobile coming towards to the shop and the sales assistant swagged out with shoulders in full "broad" mode saying "you have to switch that off now!"
I get the impression he genuinely thought I was going to kill everyone in sight.
(muzzvsworld, Mon 8 Sep 2008, 1:41, closed)

I'm amused by that phone thing...
My nearest filling station has a large sign up telling people they must turn their mobile phone's off (sic) because they emit ELECTRIC RADIATION which they claim is a fire risk.

I have never yet set fire to my hair while using my phone, and that's more likely to be flammable than petrol in those circumstances.

I refer everyone to the bit on this page about petrol:

www.intuitor.com/moviephysics/
( sanityclause is waiting until, Mon 8 Sep 2008, 19:14, closed)

I don't particularly believe the phone thing...
myself, but the rule is there it needs to be stuck to. there is also a concentration element to it, your drawing highly inflamable dangerous stuff it needs concentration, chatting on the phone is distraction.
(KavyMan Living on the ceiling, no more room down there..., Mon 8 Sep 2008, 23:36, closed)