Just read the post about jump-starting the mobility scooter

Which reminded me of the time me and the misses were on her craft stall in a big marquee in the middle of York. To provide a modicum of security, there was a wooden frame allowing the door to be locked at night (and a security guard). This frame went right around the door of course so that you could drop and raise bolts to make it more secure. The frame was probably 4"x2" pine. Not a problem.

Until Mrs 'Too fat to walk' decides to enter the marquee on her mobility scooter. The 2" step wouldn't normally be a problem, if someone in a wheel chair wanted to come in, we'd help them over with no trouble, but this woman just charged the step.

The whole fucking marquee shook. Really good when a number of stalls had pottery items carefully arranged on trestle tables. The scooter with the woman on board was not going to make it over so what did she do? Park outside and walk in? Dis-mount, carry it over and get back on? Give up and go elsewhere? Ask for help? NO.

She backed up a bit and gave it some wellie. It worked as well. Nearly destroyed £100s of stock and almost ran over a toddler, but hey, she made it without having to get off. Five minutes later she'd 'negotiatied' her way all the way round and barrelled her way out again, complaining bitterly about the height of the step.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 9:54, 5 replies)

You should have
taken her and her Squib Chariot to the nearest slipway and gently persuaded her to go for a swim. I'm sure her bipedal locomotion would have made a stunning recovery.

Idiot.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 10:00, closed)

ha ha ha
dont you just love the mobility customers. Reminds me of one woman too large to get into the recovery truck - about 30 stone i think she was. We had to order her a taxi to get home!
ha ha ha
(VodkaMargarine When there is no Brandy Butter..., Tue 9 Sep 2008, 10:23, closed)

I'd've said something to her
Probably would've told her exactly what was on my mind, but only if I was another customer.

That's the problem - usually these things only happen when working and thus gagged.
(oneltrchardonnay, Tue 9 Sep 2008, 11:53, closed)

Grr...
Reminds me of the old giffers in my home town who caused chaos on their Biddy Chariots. One of them was trying to barge through a crowd and ended up leaning sideways off the edge of a kerb, sat there looking bewildered trying to make the thing go as it sat there with wheels spinning in mid air.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 9 Sep 2008, 14:19, closed)

We've got one near us
who likes to drive his Cripple Cruiser along the dual carriageway - the wrong way! The bus drivers are running a sweep on "how long before someone squishes him".
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Tue 9 Sep 2008, 15:48, closed)