Camping in Big Sur
I'd gone on a Trek America holiday and we were going down the Pacific Coast Highway (which is beautiful if you've never been) and camped overnight in Big Sur (the place with the giant Sequoia's)
We got the obligatory talk about bears. It appears the worst thing you can do if confronted is turn and run as they can easily outrun a person. Roger, Wilco. Got that.
Anyway, woke up in the middle of the night needing the loo. Could I find my torch? Could I fark. Could I see through my contact-lensless eyes? Could I fark. Aimed myself in the general direction of the toilet block.
You know what is coming, don't you...
Halfway there I hear this snuffly snorty sound and looking to the left into the undergrowth with my myopic eyes I saw a dark black shape. Moving. And making animal noises.
Immediately I forgot the bear lecture and raced like a motherfucker to the toilet block, imagining the bear's saliva spraying the back of my neck as it went in for the kill.
Into the toilet block, slam the door. The light is on so I can see. Sort of. Still blind, no lenses. By this time I was in hysterics. Praising Jesus for saving me and promising I'd go to church ten times a day until the day I die for saving me from the bear.

A concerned face popped out from a shower stall. 'Jeez honey are you ok?'
'No, I've just escaped from a bear... it was chasing me'
'Black, large, snuffly?'
'That's him'
'Oh bless you honey that was my dog'

Moral of the story is... it's very dark at Big Sur. Keep a maglite to hand. And wear your fucking glasses.
( Sallyrsm, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 7:51, 1 reply)

Click for ID check
"Oh no officer, it couldn't have been him. He isn't snuffly"
(teebie jeebie, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 10:39, closed)