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This is a question The Dark

17,000 writes: Everything bad happens in the dark. Tell us your stories of noises and bumps in the night, power cuts, blindfolds and cinema fumbling.

(, Thu 23 Jul 2009, 15:49)
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The joys of night-blindness
I have a strange genetic condition which means my retina is slowly deteriorating. This will lead to eventual blindness. In the meantime, it provides some fun stuff like tunnel vision, night-blindness and, as a result, lots and lots of dodgy looking bruises from walking into things.

Night-blindness can make life hard, especially for seemingly normal activities of someone my age. Pubs and clubs are obstacle courses instead of fun places. I, however, have managed to put together a survival strategy for the most tedious of all problems - getting to the bog for a wazz. The strategy consists of the following:
a) Holding on until I'm literally this close to pissing myself. Keep that bladder trained;
b) Attempting to find a fellow friend who needs to go to lead me there;
c) Failing that, secret option number 3 comes into play. I find a random stranger (male or female, doesn't matter) and ask them to take me to the bog.

You'd be surprised how many pissed people find this request completely normal and actually wait for you outside to take you back to where they find you. I've even made some of my best friends this way. There have been hairy moments though which make me nervous going out at night. For example:
a) The six-foot bombshell who got creeped out by the five-foot blonde who constantly talked at her tits instead of looking at her face. It wasn't on purpose, I honestly thought I was talking to her face-to-face and I couldn't even see her fucking tits!
b) The scary man who insisted on not only accompanying me to the bog, but also on coming inside
c) Numerous tumbles down flights of stairs. Who the fuck puts flights of stairs in a club where it's dark. Loud. Full of drunk people.
d) Getting lost in a club and being escorted back to my friends by a guy who followed me around the rest of the night "just in case". Sweet.

Lastly, an anecdote. One of my friends' husbands is black as the ace of spades, as they say. She still hasn't forgiven me for being "racist" when, in a club, I looked straight through him and asked where he was. I told her that if he smiled more, I might have had a chance of seeing him. Miserable cunt.
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 13:41, 16 replies)
If it makes you feel any better
my lovely other half has keratoconus, which will eventually send him partially sighted, if not mostly blind. I love him dearly, but it does upset me a little when he watches trees and birds and tells me he wants to enjoy them while his eyes are "having a good day", because for the most part he can't see anything but defined blurs. Sometimes he takes simple pleasure in being able to read shelf edge labels in a supermarket. It makes me :(

Sorry, that was a bit of a rant. Basically, I can sort of sympathise.
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 14:40, closed)
I've got that. It's wank.
I'm finding it's difficult playing first person shooters in dark areas, as the contrasted areas are impossible to see properly.

My sight's not that bad so far but the consultant never told me about going partially sighted.

(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 15:33, closed)
don't worry
Ask them about it. If it's anything like what I've got every case is different. My Grandfather was driving until he was 60 but I on the other hand was never allowed to start driving. My sight is as bad as my mother's, who is 30 years older than I am. Maybe your case is the same. Good luck!
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 15:52, closed)
I would talk to your optician/optometrist.
I only know what I've found out on the internet or through the Manwife, so it's going to be a bit different depending on the person.
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 16:12, closed)
but surely
I should trust the internet?
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 16:20, closed)
Never trust the internet
Foolish mortal!
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 16:34, closed)

*Hugs the internet*
*whispers* they don't mean it!
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 16:41, closed)
Crap, init?
I know my hubby suffers more than I do when I walk into something or bang my head for the 900th time. Actually, I find that to deal with these things you just have to accept the fact that you end up looking like a clumsy tosspot a lot of the time. And try to not bother about it. My condition also leads to partial / complete loss of sight. I am already registered as partially sighted at 28. Bollocks to that!

I have Retinitis Pigmentosa - never heard of your man's condition but sounds like same kind of thing. So hugs to both from me. People who don't live with this or live with someone who has it don't understand that it's a serious disability to normal life, because they see us use computers and walk around unaided sometimes. But those live with us and love us know it all too well. Kudos on caring about him! I know we can be tiring and grumpy bastards sometimes :)

(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 15:49, closed)
Another one for the blind club here
I've got myopic macular degeneration. Been registered blind for nine years. Fiance has one prosthetic eye (lost it as a kid playing football - had a collision and the arm of his glasses speared his eye = no more eye.) and the other totally blind due to all sorts of severe conditions. So we're well into the clumsy tosspot club here.

People cut me more slack now that I have to use a guide cane to get about, and the fiance has a guide dog. Not much of a trade off though. I'd rather still have enough sight to be thought of as merely a clumsy arse rather than "that poor blind bird."

Still, it could be worse. We care about our loved one, and are cared about, as are you guys by the sounds of it - trite as it sounds that's worth a shit load in my book.
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 16:01, closed)
To the post above, and the one above that
Warning: Gooey relationship rubbish ahead. I think the most important thing to do in a relationship is to care for and look after each other. When one, or both of you has a condition (keratoconus for him) or a disability (dyspraxia/Aspergers for me), that care has to run to another level. When the light is bad, I hold his hand to guide him, and when I wander aimlessly into a road with the dyspraxia, he pulls me back onto the pavement to stop me getting run over. So it doesn't happen to a "normal" couple, but I think it just shows how much two people can love each other (even the way of showing it is a strange and the 'care' is an automatic thing to do).
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 16:16, closed)
I've got a Macular Oedema in my left eye, which appeared last year. For about 6 months the vision in my left eye was entirely blurry, but recently it has 'stabilised' and now my vision in that eye is quite normal, if you can ignore the honking great blind spot (I can still see fine out of it, but sometimes have to move my head about to see things that fall into the blind spot).

I'm quite lucky in that I can still drive and lead a normal life right now. I live in constant fear that it will get worse or start affecting the other eye.

Worse thing is, I'm only 21 - and the doctors and nurses of the NHS so far seem to have no idea why it happened.

Eye problems NFTW.
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 16:14, closed)
Don't worry, the good thing is most treatments for eye conditions are advancing quickly. Mine, being genetic, depends upon stem cells for any kind of hope really, but I'm still hoping. Keep on at them. Hospitals don't pay enough attention to these kinds of conditions, don't let them discharge you. Even with an incurable condition such as mine, I still insist on yearly progress check-ups just to see how things are going. That's saved me one retinal detachment and a cataract so far... They wouldn't have been found without those checkups. So BUG THEM TO KEEP LOOKING! Good luck sweets
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 16:38, closed)
At the risk of being too fluffeh
Eye issues: totally NFTW. But lovely people to take care of us / us of them: absolutely FTW.

We're so lucky, aren't we? :)
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 16:36, closed)
eye problems suck
i was born with the nerves from my left eye and my jaw connected, leading to several operations and over 20 years of treatment. i have early onset cataracts now and will eventually go blind. i have days when i can't focus, which amuses me at times. i can't bear even moderately strong sunlight and would be lost without my sunglasses. i've been in the habit of counting steps in people's houses for years, in readiness for my eventual sightlessness.
to repeat, eye problems SUCK.
(, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 16:52, closed)
...I was moaning because it's getting dark enough at nights, now, that I've got to resort to my reading glasses again.

You lot just put that into perspective.

I'm an arse.

Hats off to the lot of you.....
(, Thu 30 Jul 2009, 9:53, closed)
Nice to see we've helped with our shite eyes! Everyone moans about the small issues they have, and for all of us there's always someone with a bigger issue. For instance, the guy who walks down my road most evenings with a white stick banging into all and sundry is definitely worse off than me.

Feel free to moan and be arsey.
(, Thu 30 Jul 2009, 11:44, closed)

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