b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Darwin Awards » Post 367844 | Search
This is a question Darwin Awards

Bluffboy says: My mate cheated death and burned his eyebrows off looking down the barrel of a potato gun. Tell us about your brushes with the Grim Reaper through stupidity.

(, Thu 12 Feb 2009, 20:01)
Pages: Latest, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10, ... 1

« Go Back

Oh, the irony
Many years ago back in my student days I attended a family christening in Basingstoke. Being an Irish family christening rather a lot of beer was consumed, so I ended up back at the train station in an advanced state of refreshment.

I boarded my train back to Reading only to be told that nothing was moving as the IRA had bombed Reading station. After some time I was desperate for a whizz. Remembering that you shoudn't use the train toilets in the station I got off to use the one on the platform. As I wandered in I noticed that the floor was flooded, so I tip-toed my way through in my mate's best shoes (being a scummy student I had borrowed them to look smart). I had my slash, got back on the train and eventually made it back to Reading after clubbing together with a few other travellers and going by taxi.

It wasn't til the next weekend when I went back to Basingstoke to meet some friends that I was confronted by a large number of police, all asking whether people had been there the previous weekend. When I said that I had they whisked me off to be interviewed by a raher frightening CID copper. Turns out he had a brilliant description of me leaving the toilet trailing wet footprints. When I agreed that yes, that would have been me, he looked at me very serioulsy and in a low voice said "Do you realise you had a piss 10 feet from 5 pounds of semtex?" *Gulp* Turns out the bomb had been put in a toilet cistern, holding the ball cock down and flooding the floor. When I asked if that was a big bomb he said "It would have levelled the fucking station".

Length? Substantially longer than after I learnt the news and it shrivelled up inside my body
(, Fri 13 Feb 2009, 15:16, 5 replies)
Jesus christ!
Whoa that gets a click for scaring me!
(, Fri 13 Feb 2009, 15:18, closed)
I think in answer to his question
No of course you didn't fucking know or you wouldn't have done it!

What a stupid fucking thing to say.
(, Fri 13 Feb 2009, 15:34, closed)
at the time, presumably no-one but the IRA knew either, or the police would have already cleared the station.
(, Fri 13 Feb 2009, 17:29, closed)
for "advanced state of refreshment".

Floored with teh funneh, I am.
(, Fri 13 Feb 2009, 16:22, closed)
shitting crikey
that gets my clickage
(, Fri 13 Feb 2009, 17:02, closed)

« Go Back

Pages: Latest, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10, ... 1