My Grandfather
My Grandad was a tightass, actually he still is, but he's in a home now and doesn't get a say in his spending habits anymore.

Back to the story, a number of years ago he was redoing his own roof, despite being almost 70, and, being tight, he wouldnt get any scaffolding, instead he climbed up a series of precarious ladders and got to work. Now, he wasn't stupid so he tied a rope around his waist, tossed the other end over the apex and instructed my grandmother to secure the other end to something solid and immovable, like a fence, or a car. Which she proceeded to do.

At some point during the works he slipped and began to slide, but, since he had the foresight to secure himself he wasn't concerned.

At first.

He continued to slide, and it was at this point that he must have realised that he hadn't told my grandmother to take up the slack on the rope before securing it. So she had just tied the end of this rather long piece of rope. Fortunately for him, the rope eventually stopped him just as he cleared the lip of the roof, leaving his legs dangling freely over the back garden and I can only imagine what expletives coming from his mouth.

I only wish I could have been there to see it.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 4 Apr 2008, 11:15, 6 replies)

@Althegeordie
Are you actually my long-lost cousin? My grandad did stuff like this too, except that he nailed a bit of wood onto his ladder to hook over the ridge of his shed roof when painting it. It was a corrugated iron roof, which he painted every ten years or so with black bitumen paint.

It failed.

He fell off.

Twice. Twenty years apart.

The first time he spilled the paint over the cat. The second time it went over himself.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 4 Apr 2008, 11:22, closed)

Bitumen over a cat
Can't be good for all parties concerned.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 4 Apr 2008, 12:06, closed)

^
No, it wasn't good. I think it resulted in a trip to the vet to have its fur shaved off.

(I won't use the obvious joke)
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 4 Apr 2008, 12:14, closed)

*click* for the following...
tightass
got to work
tossed
the end
foreskin - oops! misread that, sorry, er, foresight doesn't count
long piece
back garden
coming from his mouth

/Mirth.... and kitchen ;o)
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 4 Apr 2008, 13:15, closed)

^^
Dear God...

I have to live with this constant innuendo every day...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 4 Apr 2008, 15:13, closed)

Heh heh heh
"in-u-end-o"

heh heh heh
(Bazongaloid, Fri 4 Apr 2008, 16:02, closed)