The slicer
Whilst out shopping picked up one of these:

www.vslicer.co.uk/

for not very much money at all, thought since I was a crap cook this would somehow make me better.

As soon as I got it home, I did what any red blooded man would do and tore open the box, binned the instructions and set about slicing up my vegetables with it.

Set up a 3mm depth template, grabbed a pepper and started passing it over the blade.

Amazing.... I thought... I was already producing sliced pepper rings like in the pictures on the front of the box!

Unfortunately, I was holding the pepper with my bare hand, I'd thrown the safety guard away.

You can see where this is going can't you....

Yes, nice 3mm deep slices of my thumb before I had realised what had happened.

With blood pissing everywhere, I remembered the words of my mother and stuck (what was left of) the top of my thumb under a stream of cold running water.

The motion of the water continually ran the blood away from the wound allowing me to stare with fascination at what was left of the top of my thumb, in its bloodless state. I could virtually see inside it.

Anyway, wrapped up the thumb in some gauze, went to A+E only to be treated by an old school nurse who promptly stuck it in a beaker of peroxide, much to my amusement.

Hurt like hell but the subsequent oxidising reaction stopped the bleeding rather rapidly, was dead impressed.



Length?..
Why, much shorter than when it started!
(lochii, Sat 22 Dec 2007, 2:30, 1 reply)

This is the very reason I did not buy one of these when I seen one the other day.

( Sir Pigeon Nipples Did you sit in some sugar?, Sat 22 Dec 2007, 2:43, closed)