Don versus Laptops
Working in IT Support you get used to dealing with fuckwits of the highest order, but Don surpassed the lot with his laptops

Laptop 1 Incident 1
On a plane, Don gets the great idea to take the laptop out of its intended bag and wrap it in a towel in his Samsonite suitcase. Result = 1 fucked screen costing £700 to repair on a non-warranty cost from Dell

Laptop 1 Incident 2
Don goes away over Xmas and is worried about leaving his laptop at home in case of burglaries. So he has the great idea of taking it out of its case so if he is broken into, they may get the case but not the laptop.
OK - so where to hide it???
How about under that pile of wood in your big open wooden fireplace.
You can see where this is leading to..... and yes he did come back forget about it and light the fire forgetting all about his laptop underneath.
I would have loved to have been there at the moment of realisation. He brought it into the office and the smell hit you as soon as you opened the bag, all the keys had fallen off, the plastic had melted the screen - but amazingly the battery still worked. He even had the nerve to ask if anything may be recovered from the frazzled hard drive...

He got a used laptop next time due to stupidity reasons.

Laptop 2 is leased and after the leasing period is up, managers decide that he is worthy of a new one again.

He comes in, I spend 1/2 the day configuring his new laptop and transferring all the data on to it, handed over and all is happy with the world.

Until the next morning when I get a phone call. My office was City Centre Manchester and Don used to travel in for any IT stuff from miles away out in the sticks. He got caught up in a traffic jam on the way home from the office and decides to try and do a shortcut through the other side of town. Getting completely lost, he pulls over goes to his boot and gets his A-Z out to try and find where he is.

Whilst looking at the map, he hears his boot open and looks out to see 2 scrotes legging it down the street with his brand new laptop which had been on view there for all to see.

Where had he got lost? Moss Side, which for anyone who doesn't know Manchester is the place you are most likely to get shot round these parts.

I left shortly after so haven't heard of any more escapades, the one regret I have is no having any pictures of the burnt laptop.
(brocky, Fri 26 Oct 2007, 21:40, Reply)