I'm an expertI spent four years of my life acquiring a PhD. This makes me an expert in the use of transparency in computer interfaces. It's not a hugely useful or interesting expertise, but it's all mine. I'm pretty hot at sitting on the sofa, too.
What are you lot experts in?
(
chthonic, Thu 23 Jun 2005, 14:43)
« Go Back
Pissing like a ninjaBecause of the Nazi nature of meine Mutter, she won't let me stay up all night on the family computer, insisting I go to "bed" at about 11pm. I piss about on the computer in my room for a few hours (which is modestly brilliant, but cannot run Half Life 2 or CS:S), then sneak downstairs (a harrowing adventure if there ever was one).
After these downstairs excursions, I have to pee like a madman. I have perfected the art of pissing like a ninja (ie. totally silently) so as not to wake the Fuhrer. The trick is to aim it so that it hits the most vertical part of the bowl, but not the water. Unfortunately the most vertical part of the bowl is right next to the water, which makes this truly an artform.
Well, no, it doesn't, but it's a useful skill to put on your CV: Can piss silently in any situation.
Further to this, I am an expert at thinking up airtight, bulletproof excuses as to why I haven't done work. Failing that, I am also an expert at physically hiding under items of furniture to avoid teachers.
The length thing is getting annoying, but at least it's encouraging some people to think.
(, Wed 29 Jun 2005, 17:03, Reply)
« Go Back