Vic Reeves.
aka Jim Moir.

Just.not.funny.

I can't remember ever hearing a witty line uttered from his mouth, neither can I remember seeing a sketch that had any wit in it. I do remember sketches that made no sense, so that people could laugh and when you ask "what's funny about that?" could look at you like you just shit in their ear and say "oh, don't you get it?". Very clever Vic/Jim whatever, but some people are not sucked in by that drivel and done-to-death *comedy* tactic.

On top of that, the twunt owes me a pint. I was playing with my band some years ago, when Jim comes up in the break and being friends with our singer asked if he could sing a few numbers in the second set. Up he comes and starts singing a load of crap "in the style of a club singer", whislt stomping around like a downs on mdma, when a friend of mine plants a nice, shiny, full pint up on the stage in front of me. I smile appreciatevly, and a few seconds later the song ends. Vic doing his usual "look at me, I look like a mong" act, throws the mic stand down on the floor.

Sadly, my pint was in the way of the floor and so it was no longer a pint.
I look at him, and he at me.

Just when I thought I heard the words, "Oh shit, sorry about that mate, let me get you another one. What was it you were drinking?", I realised that I was, of course, mistaken and the tight-fisted cnut had actually said no such thing, and instead had simply walked off stage.

Twunt.

To top it off, despite having got rid of the TV some years ago (never bothered replacing my old CRT when it finally gave up the ghost after too many house moves), he lives about 4-5 miles from me, and even if I pop to the local shop he seems to bloody show up.

There is no escape.
(dchurch bah, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 13:01, Reply)