DAVID ICKE
Self proclaimed “most controversial speaker and author in the world." He argues that human beings are the result of a breeding program conducted by a race of reptilians called Anunnaki from the planet Draco, and that what we call reality is nothing but a holographic experience. He also used to present the sport on TV and was a former goalkeeper for my hometown club... Shocking... Absolutely shocking... Couldn't save a penalty for toffee, David Icke.

I remember watching the interview he did with Terry Wogan and laughing my tits off. Please feel free to laugh your own tits off at your pleasure here:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=2OSmdej56cw

This bloke is – without a doubt – a grade A first class nutter.

Then a couple of years back I was strolling through Archway near my gaff on a mission to pick up a few cans of Stella and a pizza, and I noticed a shitload of people were pretty damn well freaked out. They were stood still, gazing up at the darkening sky. I turned my head upwards and witnessed this:

www.islingtongazette.co.uk/content/islington/gazette/news/story.aspx?brand=ISLGOnline&category=news&tBrand=northlondon24&tCategory=newsislg&itemid=WeED09%20Feb%202007%2010%3A56%3A52%3A220

And here’s the vid:

www.islingtongazette.co.uk/video/UFOfootage.aspx

And it pretty much freaked the freaking freaky fuck out of me. Apparently they were explained away as those little Chinese lantern things – fuck that. They were moving too fast and in tight formation, stopping occasionally to have a bit of a hover. Some people said they were planes. Quite frankly if you live in this part of North London on Heathrow and Gatwick’s flight path you know what a fucking plane looks and sounds like. Now, I’m not saying these were lizard men having a bit of a butchers at the good folk of Archway on their way to some Intergalactic Commission where David Icke was guest speaker, but...

And the scariest part of this for me was that for a brief moment I actually thought: Maybe that David Icke fella isn’t a complete nutjob after all...

But I came to my senses pretty damn quickly. Well, maybe all this lizard man bollocks might just possibly have a grain of truth to it... But David Icke was and probably still is an incredibly shit goalkeeper. So, in years to come when he may, just may be proven right, I can carry on hating him for that reason alone.
( SpankyHanky, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:18, 17 replies)

I hate people that talk bollocks too.

( Peej, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:37, closed)

Oh do piss off
this is getting old. You dont like Spanky's posts. Big deal. Put him on ignore you cretin - think you should read Legless' post on page 7.
(Errin C, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:40, closed)

Excuse me?
*edit*

A. Didn't realise it was spanky and the first time I actually agree with him you say that
and
B. Do piss off if you don't like what I post put me on ignore you cretin.
( Peej, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:42, closed)

P.S. Your own QOTW post
Whoop-dee-fuckin-do !
Every week if you want to get on the best of page post a photo of a fucking kitten !

Wow ! Now, that takes a lot of thought and wit. Cunts.
( Peej, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:58, closed)

Defo chinese lanterns.
I've set some off myself and they do move in mysterious ways!

You're right though, Icke is barking. He could be right about the royal family though.
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:44, closed)

I'm seven minutes into the You Tube vid.
He's completely fucking hatstand
( Peej, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:45, closed)

Errin C cool down FFS!!!
ITS ONLY THE INTERNET !!!

As for this weird shit - having expereinced this first hand along with several hundred others saying: WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE ??? I'm pretty sure they wern't lanterns. It was pretty damn windy that night and these things were moving AGAINST the fucking wind. Weird.

Maybe I should go and dig out my tinfoil helmet??? Hmmm
( SpankyHanky, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:49, closed)

Different windspeed at different heights
will mean they do look that way yes!
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:54, closed)

I'd love to have seen them with my own eyes
but I'm pretty sure there's a logical explanation. The worlds a weird place. Wind can be going in a different direction up there too. I've seen what can happen when one person goes what the fuck is that and then suddenly shit loads of people are doing the same and freaking. One evening myself and at least 20 others saw a dead body in an underpass and we were all freaking out and talking about calling the police but no-one wanted to go down and check. After about ten minutes of freaking myself and a friend went down there we didn't have to walk far down the slope for the angle of vision to change and for us to quite clearly see a dumped mattress. but when we told everyone that it was a mattress they still wanted to check for themselves or call the police.
( Peej, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:55, closed)

Believe me
I'm the biggest skeptic I know... well, I was prior to this. Having seen it with my own eyes while stone cold sober I can honestly say it was fucking odd... You could sort of tell from standing on Archway Road they wern't small objects far away, they were big objects in the middle distance. And you could also tell they wern't caught in the wind and appeared to move under some internal power sauce(r)... Shame that vids the only one I could find on account of it being a bit shit.

Freaked me out big time, this did. Big time.
( SpankyHanky, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 16:58, closed)

No, you can't tell that.
Unless it overlaps with an object of known size, it is impossible to tell the size of something that is more than 18 metres away.

Look up at a plane in the sky - if you didn't know how big it is, you would never be able to guess.

We judge the size of things by the slightly different views we get from each eye. More than 18 metres away and our eyes are too close together to successfully do so.

It could be a spaceship at 100,000m or it could be a fire balloon at 19m. I know where my money is.
( MatJ LOOK, Sun 7 Feb 2010, 15:37, closed)

That was me
popping out to get a cosmic pizza of my own :-)
(Spaceboy1, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 17:13, closed)

Good old David Icke
Yes, sometimes he does get a bit carried away,but he does speak a lot sense. The holographic theory about consciousness is gaining more and more weight as a scientific theory, and I myself believe that it may well be on the right tracks. His alternate dimension rants are fairly easy to understand. A decent analogy is if you consider that our 'dimension' is BBC1, and that's what we are watching/experiencing, then there are lots of other channels being broadcast at the same and if we have the right decoding equipment we can tune into them as well.

If you can look past the 10 foot lizard schtick, then the rest of what he says is reasonably straightforward and not altogether bullshit.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 17:21, closed)

The holographic theory about consciousness is gaining more and more weight as a scientific theory[citation needed]
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 20:09, closed)

www.acsa2000.net/bcngroup/jponkp/
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 22:46, closed)

Except his barking theories on 9/11
Someone loaned me one of his books, so I thought it'd be a giggle. What he does, is take a very small assumption, such as government not being as transparent as you'd think (very astute there David), and manages to extrapolate it into 300 pages of utter toss and bollocks.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Sat 6 Feb 2010, 1:21, closed)

Well I wouldn't know if it's related.
I saw something very similar with a friend of mine. Formation lights in the sky moving at a very slow pace. It was new year's eve at the time, and I inevitably figured either very quiet aircraft to start the apocalypse (as a airfix model maker and full time student mechanic my mate debunked this theory) or possibly embers from the fireworks shot up ahead of us, from cookridge to meanwood; it seemed it was from that direction the lights were coming from. Though there weren't so many, they were as smooth as the lights shown here. Of course lanterns sound an even more plausible idea.
( Christian's Bolt and Ski, Sat 6 Feb 2010, 2:04, closed)