Fresh from the oven
Family feud? I reckon I might well have just started one.

Last weekend my sister decided to visit me at uni. Nothing that out of the ordinary, except that my girlfriend's family also decided it was about time they found out if the rest of my family are as screwed up as myself. The only reason I agreed is because my sister's the only one who's remotely sane - myself included. So there's 6 of us going around Sheffield, having a pretty decent time all round - me, my girlfriend, my sister, the parents ... and *her* 17 year old sister. This girl (let's call her R) and me have always had a bit of friendly arguing going on. She's been more than happy to give me everything ranging from dirty looks to attempts at dead legs, and I've been content in treating her like a bratty little sister. However, this time round she goes a little too far and starts getting on my nerves. So, I decide to get a little payback.

Two things before I carry on with this - first, R is ridiculously paranoid, and easy to wind up with it. I can get her to panic by just staring at the back of her neck and giggling slightly. Secondly, I have a really nasty sense of humour, *particularly* when it comes to practical jokes. I once 'shopped a tattoo onto my girlfriend's facebook photo as an April Fool's, just to watch her parents' reaction. Now, a particular favourite of mine is to leave an apparently used condom in a bag - relax, it's only milk, I'm not a total bastard. I even rinse them off to make sure it doesn't leave any lube around. My sister's already encountered this one before, but luckily (for her, at least) she found it while she was at home. R, on the other hand, was not so lucky...

Having put up with her most of Saturday, I get a chance to leave my calling card in her bag while she's out of the room. Me, my girlfriend and sister watch her folks leave while sniggering to ourselves and taking bets on how long it'll be there for. Personally, I'd reckon it be found the next day, but come Sunday, no mention of it. Yesterday, I got home from lectures to find a particularly harsh facebook message from R. It turns out she'd finally found the condom. In her geography class. Stuck to her folder. In front of her mates and her teacher. Did I mention she goes to a Catholic school?

Needless to say, I found this absolutely bloody hilarious. But I seriously doubt she'll forgive me for this one, and the parent's might have a few strong words for me too. I've also just realised that I'm going with her to the Motorhead gig in Manchester this weekend, so any b3tans in the area keep an eye on the sky for a pair of speeding objects - it'll probably be my lovespuds being knocked into orbit.

Apologies for length - it was an extra-large brand
(Nykrus, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 10:47, 2 replies)

you're kerayzee
with a capital k
( shitkicker, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:36, closed)

Brilliant!
Nicely done on the pranks :)
(SpangoTheWonderBadger is brewing beer, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 14:58, closed)