Sonic James Dooms post below
Has unfortunately reminded me of this incident which I had managed to forget until now :(

A semi wild camping weekend a few years ago, 20+ of us and 2 open chemical toilets in a wooden shack.
They were supposed to be emptied every night but strangely no-one actually turned up to do it.
Mid week they had begun to whiff a bit so I tended to just go off and find a spot in the woods instead.
Caught short late one night towards the end of the week I decided to risk using the loo rather than stumble around in the dark.
Entering the dark shack I decided not to switch on my torch so I wouldnt see the horror, dropped my trousers, held my nose and proceeded to hover over the bowl.
As I lowered down something cold and wet made contact with my nether regions.
I had a millisecond of puzzlement immediately replaced by cold fear and horrific realisation.
I was boking even before I switched the torch on, stood up and dared to look behind me.
The loo was not only full, it had a mound of crap and toilet paper reaching up a good few inches above the bowl.
And this Golgothan shit demon had just kissed my arse.
I did not have a good night
(insomniac-surfer oh go on then, just this once, Fri 3 Feb 2012, 0:38, 6 replies)

you've never been to a festival, have you?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 3 Feb 2012, 7:04, closed)

Last time I went (Glasto, around the turn of the millenium)
the toilets weren't too bad, although it may have been the same year that sewage got accidentally sprayed into the dance tent.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 3 Feb 2012, 9:30, closed)

That was 1998
...good times!
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Fri 3 Feb 2012, 10:56, closed)

just the odd few probably mentioned in previous posts
(insomniac-surfer oh go on then, just this once, Fri 3 Feb 2012, 16:11, closed)

i liked the Golgothan Shit Demon description

(Cov Boy, Fri 3 Feb 2012, 9:56, closed)

nice
/tips hat at the excellent Dogma reference ;)
(mr_spongmonkey, Fri 3 Feb 2012, 10:52, closed)