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Enzyme says: Tell us your tales of grot, grime, dirt, detritus and mess

(, Thu 2 Feb 2012, 13:04)
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When I was 20 I went camping with my sister in the south of France, sisterly bonding we told our parents. Honestly, it was more so we could drink away all our hard earned cash.

The campsite was well equipped, the scenery was breath taking and for the first week all was well. We drank wine, bbq'd anything that would fit on the grill and often fell asleep under the stars (it was very good wine).

Yep, the holiday was off to a terrific start. Until one afternoon, when I made the treck to the toilet block. There were at least 15 cubicles that I could have chosen and pretty much all were free, so I can only deduce that it was the fickle finger of fate that poked me into that fated cubicle.

The bogmonster was climbing out of that bowl with a wink and a smile - I glimpsed it for only moment but that thing is etched on my brain forever. The head must have been more than 2 inches clear of the water and I couldn't see the tail. Truely this was a very impressive shit, monumental by most standards.

When I got back to the tent I quickly told my sister of the discovery and, considering she is very much a girly girl, showed a distict lack of horror. In fact, she was going redder and redder and avoiding all eye contact with me.

Yeah, my 18 year old sister had laid a cable of simply epic proportions. Part of me was disgusted, part of me was very proud. But a large part of me was in fits of laughter on the floor as she desperatly told me how, no matter how much she flushed, the damn thing wouldn't go away, and seemed to get higher up the bowl!

Length - couldn't see the end of it...
(, Fri 3 Feb 2012, 19:48, 3 replies)
Where's the bit about the kid burning your neck?
2/10, terrible Jacob Dyer impression.
(, Fri 3 Feb 2012, 20:06, closed)
I did one of those in a train toilet once
That fucker was going nowhere.
(, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 1:08, closed)
An ex & I were camping down south years ago.
We pulled up into the Tourist Centre, she's off to the dunny and I'm sorting out camp-grounds. She grabs me as I come out and drags me into the Ladies to show me her "Foot Long". Now I had *ahem* "been there" wih this young lady and there is no way I could imagine that fitting thru her tight, delicate sphincter.
But it began a tradition of 1-upmanship to see who could do the biggest log. Turned out she could.
But traveling to the Khyber was never the same for me after that.
EDIT: A big bucket of water poured quickly (careful not to splash) usually does the trick.
(, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 4:33, closed)

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