My first run in with the old bill
was as a result of my inquisitiveness as to what the results would be of a firework display in a phone box. It was extremely entertaining, but as I had taken the precaution of booting out a couple of glass panels (the old red phone boxes) to make sure there was plenty of oxygen (young and simple)and as the experiment was conducted opposite a petrol station and one of the witnesses - Gary Brown, 15 Cheltenham Crescent, Thornton Cleveleys, Lancs - was a grasser I got 'done' for it. Fortunately it was only an official caution at the local nick and there was a girl there that day being 'done' for drunk and disorderly who 15 years later I shagged after bringing the episode up in a nightclub (she was a stripper by then). Good things come to those who burn.
(If you tolerate piss then excreta will be next, Wed 3 Mar 2004, 21:22, Reply)