Masterclass Lessons in Flirting
During the second year of my degree, a new student joined our class - Richard. I say new, but he actually transfered from the Typography course, and believed he was the greatest designer and artist of all time.

He wasn't THAT arrogant or anything, just, how should I say, on another planet. He was generally a nice chap, but could be a bit unpredicatble and odd.

To put this in perspective, he believed he was a dashing 1950s gentleman and dressed accordingly, who would offer you cigarettes out of a custom made case with his own personal logo on each cancer stick.

He had a seriously unhealthy obsession with hunting and guns -an obsession that resulted in him pulling a gun on a fellow student after he took a light hearted prank the wrong way (but that is another story for another QOTW).

He also fancied himself as quite the ladies man, despite having all the tack and charm in those situations as roadkill.

Myself, some mates and Richard all left the Uni' one lunchtime to go in search of food, as was the fashion of the time and we made our way to the near-by Shopping centre/mall's food court.

Richard spied two young ladies (in their twenties) sat at a table. He held up both his hands to halt our little group

"That Brunette looks cute; guys, watch a master at work!"

Richard strolled up to the girl on the left of the table, with his most alluring walk, one eyebrow raised and his most charming smirk.

"How would you like to go out with me for a drink, sometime?" he said, in an overly loud tone, one hand on the table, one on his hip, and obviously way to close to the girl as she recoilled back.

"Errrmmm... No thankyou..." she muttered, with just a hint of shock.

Without a pause, and only moving his head to face the girl on the right, he then asked:

"how about you?"

All we could do was slowly back away as this car-crash of a proposal turned into a full-blown pile-up with exploding petrol tankers and everything.

As the second girl turned him down, he walked away, and on passing us uttered the immortal phrase:

"Well, I didn't like them that much anyway..."
( theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 22 Feb 2010, 11:21, 4 replies)

Its a pretty awsome sight
watching a car crash like this happen first hand. Cheers.
( SpankyHanky, Mon 22 Feb 2010, 11:47, closed)

I am totally going to try this one.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 22 Feb 2010, 13:03, closed)

Good story, but fail for use of reflexive pronoun.
Pedantry shall prevail!
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 22 Feb 2010, 13:24, closed)

Hahahaha, what a prick.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 23 Feb 2010, 1:36, closed)