many moons ago...
a rather lunatic roadie from Glasgow (lunatic? Glasgow?... shurely just a coincidence) named John crashed and burned trying to negotiate the pants off a young groupie..
He was miffed!
Returning to a band member's house, groupies in tow, unusually John jumps up and asks if everyone wanted toast to quell the munchies and disappears into the kitchen.
When he returns with a plateful, he hand them out carefully turning the plate to make sure that the offered piece was accepted by the recipient.
He then proceeded to sit and laugh for the rest of evening to the bemusement of all present... it was passed off as just too much illegal substances...
The next morning he explained to some of those present that whilst in the kitchen, he'd squeezed a little nugget of the brown stuff out of his anus and spread it over a piece of toast which he had very diligently made sure was accepted by the aforementioned groupie.

He's a smashing bloke but as mad as bag of monkeys.
I only ever ate once more with him and that was in a restaurant... and another tale.
(bof, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 14:37, 6 replies)

He shat on her toast
Because she wouldn't shag him?

Really?
(Scrumpy does not negotiate with terrorists,, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 14:55, closed)

Honest...
He did...
I think it was more the way she turned hom down rather than the fact he was turned down.. He was a bit of a minger and I think that's what she might have said to him..
He is a really terrific bloke but totally and utterly barking....
(bof, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 14:59, closed)

Yeah, but he's a really terrific bloke

( Newington, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 15:48, closed)

He is...
Difference is I know him...
I don't know you... so don't try and act superior.
(bof, Sun 21 Sep 2008, 12:18, closed)

Well, unless
Newington regularly shits on peoples toast, he's not going to have to act very much to appear superior is he?
( Bazongaloid, Sun 21 Sep 2008, 20:21, closed)

That's very much the point...
I was making.
Perhaps Newington has foibles that are as equally repellant.
I certainly don't know and I am not in a position to judge him any more than he is of John, me or even your good self.
(bof, Mon 22 Sep 2008, 11:20, closed)