I hope to never win the lottery
^This is something my mum has always said. I was always sceptical, to be honest. Not so much now.

I don't really gamble, but when I was around 12 I used to pick up lottery scratch cards from the pavement on my way home from school. The friend I walked with was obviously a bit embarrassed about this and didn't want to be seen with me as I bent down to pick them up.

Until, that was, I found one that had won £200. I was so happy. Seriously, it was one of the best moments of my life in terms of unbridled exitement. I ran straight to the local newsagents (where the staff knew me from my constant purchasing of penny sweets) and asked them to double check. It was real alright, but I couldn't claim as I was under 16. So I went home and hid it in the back of my stereo speakers until my parents came home. I was buzzing like a capitalist version of charlie and the chocolate factory.

When my mum came in, I showed her and we went to Sainsbury's to claim it. I told the woman what happened and she was really happpy for me. I felt like a star for the day - everyone geniunely so happy for me. And then I learned an important lesson about money...it makes things complicated.

The embarrassed friend was suddenly pissed off the next day. Just the normal jealousy of a kid, but it shat all over my excitement. Then my brother was grumpy when he saw me counting out the £20 notes on the front room floor (c'mon I felt like a millionaire...I had to relish it!). So, in the end I begrudgingly gave £20 to the friend as a good will gesture and rather more happily gave my brother £60 to cheer up. Almost half of the money was spent on making the people around me as happy as before I'd got it. Ffs.

In the end I bought a watch, some cds, and computer games. I didn't last long, but that was the point really - to buy things I wouldn't normally. But I learned one thing about the lottery...If you were to ever win the jackpot, things would get very complicated and you'd probably have to chuck cash at people to stop them from hating you. I don't really want to turn friendship into a process of monetary appeasement so I don't play.

Or, on the other hand, I could always just get rid of my poor mates and buy some new rich ones. But rich people all seem like pricks. :(
( thiswasmyclone, Sat 9 May 2009, 20:45, 5 replies)

I reckon if I ever won proper money
I would do my best to keep it secret
( The Coast Of Yemen, Sat 9 May 2009, 20:56, closed)

So let me get this straight...
You actually think that it's better not to be wealthy?

Oh, well. Suit yourself. Just don't expect me to repay that tenner you lent me. I'm doing you a favour, really.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Sat 9 May 2009, 23:46, closed)

if you win
keep it secret.

and if your friends find out and can't handle you having more money than they do, or you think in order to keep them your friends you have to keep giving them money, then you know theyre not really your friends :) it's simple really.
(zenmeban thinks the weather could be better, Sun 10 May 2009, 7:17, closed)

I'm not a prick!
I'm also not rich

(One of these is a lie)
( chart cat has an itch, Mon 11 May 2009, 12:06, closed)

i disagree
if i ever win the lottery jackpot my friend's could all fuck off if they didn't like it.

i could just buy new ones. easy.
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Tue 12 May 2009, 18:22, closed)