First foray into capitalism
When I was a youngun (8 or 9)I decided to become a chocolate tycoon like Willy Wonka, having shrewdley noticed that kids like sweets.

I had a quick look to see if I could employ any oompa loompas, (my little brother was the right height but objected to being painted orange with a crayons)then decided to strike out by myself.

My business planning would have made Branson proud. I set up a stall (cardboard box) in front of my house selling individual sweets for 2 or 3p, kinda like a pick n mix. The maths was simple Tube of smarties= 25p and you get about 20 sweets in a tube. Selling individual smarties for 2p each = 40p giving you a nice 40% profit (or something). I even spent an afternoon making posters to stick around the street.

Incredibly I started raking in 3 or 4 quid a day, my poket money at the time was 30p a day so that was MEGABUCKS! I started to dream of branching out and living a life of fast cars and faster women but my dreams were cut short.

One afternoon a cop came past and asked what I was doing. I told him and hinted that maybe he would like some free rolo´s for his trouble. He just looked at me and then went and knocked on my door and asked for my dad. Then he and my dad (who knew nothing of my scheme)had a quiet conversation about the trading laws. When he left my dad and me had a rather less quiet conversation about how much beating I could take with his shoe.

I´ve never been in sales since.

Edit. I should point out the beating was mainly for the attempted bribery and only slightly for not cutting him in on the profits.
(Bo Nidle Coming back in from the cold., Fri 1 Aug 2008, 13:43, 2 replies)

*click*
Brilliant story, brilliantly old. Bribing the bizzees with Rolo's - inspired!
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 1 Aug 2008, 13:46, closed)

fucking rozzers
stamping on the dreams of young entrepreneurs (too many e's in that word)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 1 Aug 2008, 13:47, closed)