Pearoastish
Contrary to popular opinion, I always enjoyed Home Economics at school. My mum didn't trust me with cooking at home (due to a mild pyrophilia) and so any chance to get busy with the pots and pans was taken with relish.

One week, we were assigned with the task with making our own cakes. The school would provide the boring stuff like flour, eggs, milk, water, etc, but we would have to sort our our own icing, jam, skunk or whatever else we wanted to liven up the sponge with.

Now, you have to get into the mindset of the modern (well, 1990's) teenager. As if you're going to remember instructions. I recall mumbling something to my mum about 'cake stuff' and left it for a week.

Come the morning of the cake bake, and yes, I had bugger all to show for decorations. Luckily, my dear mum had purchased icing, jam and SILVER BALLS; hard, sugary goodness coated in a colour that could only be tenuously described as 'silver'. I was prepared.

Now, William Burroughs described Heroin as the ultimate commodity, as the consumer is sold to the product, rather than the other way round. If only he was present in Room HE1 that day.

It turned out that barely anyone else had brought anything, and my little hoard of confection was the only means of enlivening their shitty sponge.

Knowing that some 'Jesus and the feeding of the five thousand' situation wouldn't commence - despite my protestations, I am not the Son Of God - I decided to charge:

10p per silver ball.
20p for a level tablespoon of icing sugar.
50p for a level tablespoon of jam.

I made a killing. In fact as demand outstripped supply I was soon doubling prices in a feeble (yet ultimately successful, as I happened to come out with some lovely butterfly buns) attempt to maintain my own decoration supply.

And lo, at the age of just 13, I appeared to have mastered the tenets of classical economics and exploited the powerless working classes in a way that would make Milton Friedman celebrate and Charlie Marx chew furiously on his beard, all the while having plenty of sugary goodness to return to my pro-active mother.

Marvellous.
(scentless_apprentice takes two bottles into the shower!, Tue 5 Aug 2008, 16:17, 2 replies)

So how much did you make?
If you remember...
(EuroSong I love horse meat: best of all the animals, Tue 5 Aug 2008, 19:33, closed)

erm...
I think it was about twenty quid. For a council estate scum 13 year old this is a fortune!
(scentless_apprentice takes two bottles into the shower!, Tue 5 Aug 2008, 19:42, closed)