We got off to a shitty start
Following on from this:

www.b3ta.com/questions/gooutwithme/post231567

Here's my side........

So, the prelude to our meeting involved him watching scat pron. (He says it was cringeworthy.) My combats were those camouflage ones, with tassly bits dangling from every pocket. On which I'd pissed earlier in the evening. (That's why I binned them in the end, every time I went for a wee, at least 2 or 3 tassles would sneak in the pan before I realised.)

I'd been dragged into the god-awful HQ by my girly friends - it really is a hideous establishment; an unadulterated meat market with sticky floors (spilled alcopops & manfat). We got chatting to some blokes, one of whom, Dave said, "You'd be really good for my mate over there," and promptly deposited a tallish, attractive bloke in front of me, dressed like an old school goth with fuck-off spikey hair. "Yeah, he could be my cup of tea," thought I, "I'll give him a whirl..."

He was wearing a particularly good quality tactile leather jacket, on which I commented. "My wife bought it for me," was his snooty response.

"Fuck that, and him then," thought I, and returned to my mates. A short while later, Dave comes back over and says, "You two hit it off then? Have you arranged a date?"

"Er, no."

"Why not? I really think you two would get on like a house on fire..."

"The fucker's married! I'm not playing..."

"Yes, but they've been apart over a year, he's moving on! Please, at least swap phone numbers?"

So, at Dave's insistence we did. Then all his mates left as did mine, and we were alone. We chatted about the usual - music, art and beer. On kicking out time, the taxi queue was snaking around the town square like a smelly burbery python. So I accepted his offer of a coffee at his place, just up the street, from where I could call a cab in comfort.

My problem on entering his place was where to sit in order to cause the least possible damage/offence. You see, not only was I dangling pissy tassles from my combats, but I'd also "done a Pooflake" towards the end of the night and spectacularly shat myself. (IBS combined with too little to eat + too much beer.) Luckily, or perhaps not, it was a watery one as opposed to solid, so I'd managed to clean it up reasonably well and padded my floorpan with extra bogroll to be on the safe side. I scanned the furniture: a cream sofa from Ikea - that was a no-no... aha, a black leather chair! I could get away with that if I was careful. So I sat side-saddle. As I swirled my coffee I couldn't help admiring his extremely horny boots (in my head, lest he thought I was a perv) Then I noticed his CD collection; Violent Femmes, Iggy Pop...

So my taxi arrived, he escorted me out and we arranged a date for the following week. That was 5 and a half years ago....

The irony that we met on March 14th, Red Nose Day that year, as opposed to 4 weeks earlier is not lost on me. Thank goodness for Dave and his insistence.
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sat 30 Aug 2008, 14:04, 14 replies)

Well...
you learn something new every day!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 30 Aug 2008, 14:13, closed)

^ he didn't know
I'd "done a Pooflake" until last night...

Still getting hitched in April though!
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sat 30 Aug 2008, 14:21, closed)

Tell It Like It Was.
The first date.

Hockeling contest.

That's when I knew it was true love....

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Sat 30 Aug 2008, 14:21, closed)

^ hee hee
That's to follow, I promise :o)

Now, I really must CRACK ON with decorating.
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sat 30 Aug 2008, 14:23, closed)

Technically
it wasn't the first date. But it was the first time we'd been out that didn't involve just alcohol / food and doing something more grown up...

I'll leave it at that for now!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 30 Aug 2008, 14:26, closed)

Chortles
That made me spit my beer out!

Having met them both, I can safely concur that DG is a very snappy dresser indeed. Tourettes manages to get away with being outrageous in no small way thanks to her very personable and charming nature.

Match made in heaven? You betcha.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Sat 30 Aug 2008, 16:49, closed)

"Done a Pooflake"
Genius!
And you got away with it too!


"Click"
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Sat 30 Aug 2008, 18:52, closed)

That Tourette's
She's well classy, like.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Sat 30 Aug 2008, 20:08, closed)

meeting on my birthday ...
is still no consolation that i was compelled to google veronica moser - i mean why did i do that. i know what scat is. its not for me. but i still googled. why?

}–(
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Sat 30 Aug 2008, 20:29, closed)

Spimf, mate
You REALLY did not want to do that...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 30 Aug 2008, 20:51, closed)

This QOTW is turning out to be a corker
thanks to posts like this *salutes*
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sun 31 Aug 2008, 10:36, closed)

I can't wait
to meet the pair of you.

*click*

*hugs*
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Sun 31 Aug 2008, 12:17, closed)

Imagine my joy to realise I have become a 'verb'...

But does someone have to be witty, charming or grammatically sublime to do a 'pooflake'?

...

nope - they just need some putrid kex papperage action.

ah well...at least I have contributed something to the history books...my mum will be so proud...
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Mon 1 Sep 2008, 15:48, closed)

Poo
Can't believe you went back to a bloke's house having done a "pooflake"! That takes a lot of guts (so to speak). Ahem.
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Tue 2 Sep 2008, 7:05, closed)