Guilty SecretsWe were shocked - nay, disgusted - to read on an internet discussion forum of a chap's confession that his darkest, guiltiest secret was that he recently cracked one out over press photos of tragic MILF Kate McCann. He reasoned that "she's a good Catholic girl and looks dirty, so she'd probably go bareback".
What guilty secrets can you no longer keep to yourself?
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Fri 31 Aug 2007, 12:22)
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self abuseWhile an adolescent, I was forced to think of ever more elaborate scenarios for my daily (or hourly) tug. Anything to make strangling the chicken a bit more spicy. I came up with:
- Tugging in my sister's bed
- Tugging up a tree
- Cutting out the lining of pockets and tugging as I strolled
- Having a stroke in toilets anywhere
- Carefully extracting a banana from its skin before using said skin as a fruitsome johnny
- Have carnal knowledge of a range of fruit and vegetables
- Using my rigid tool as a stencil to illustrate a rather lurid letter to Samatha Fox
- Encoraging a cat to lick my tip (Kitty had no interest)
- Calling up moan 'n' groan phonelines at great expense
- Connecting my cock to batteries
- Using the friction of a silk scarf pulled quickly across an engorged helmet...
There are too many to remember. I must have pulled the pud pretty much everyday for the last 20 years. My prostate could squeeze coal into diamonds
(, Wed 5 Sep 2007, 16:52, Reply)
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