My mate and I were verbally sparring, and were commanding something of an audience in a quiet little Somerset boozer.
He said something, and I nailed him - absolutely fucking nailed him to the fucking floor, and our friends gathered 'round laughed heartily at my wit, until he came back with, as the laughter died down:

"Well ... I FUCKED YOUR MUM!"

It was the absolutely perfect response - perfectly timed, and perfectly lame in contrast with the level at which we'd been operating.

Everyone - including me - fell about laughing - I know it's "You had to be there" territory, but that's the point - this was over 20 fucking years ago, and it was mentioned to me recently by one of the audience members.

And can anyone remember what my amazing insult was - the one that had nailed him to the floor?

Can they fuck.

Not even me.

The one time in my life I've actually ever been funny - gone in the blink of an eye.

Fuck you - it's Friday and I'm about to go to the pub.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 15:11, 3 replies)

Was your insult:
“Go, prick thy face, and over-red thy fear, Thou lily-liver’d boy.”
?
(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 15:13, closed)

Go thy face, and over-red thy fear, Thou lily-liver’d boy.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 21:10, closed)

Truthfully though
You should show your father a bit more respect.
(Richy_T hundreds if not thousands of dollars, Sun 15 Jun 2014, 22:07, closed)