I'm going to Hell...
...because I said the Lord's Prayer backwards at a funeral to summon up the Goat of Mendes, Freddie Woo tells us. Tell us why you're doomed.
Thanks to Kaol for the suggestion
( , Thu 11 Dec 2008, 13:09)
...because I said the Lord's Prayer backwards at a funeral to summon up the Goat of Mendes, Freddie Woo tells us. Tell us why you're doomed.
Thanks to Kaol for the suggestion
( , Thu 11 Dec 2008, 13:09)
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Probably one for "Bastard Colleagues"
Chap I once worked with was the most snivelling, insincere individual it has ever been my misfortune to meet. You know the type, he'd greet with a simpering "Hello mate!" first thing in the morning, before turning the knife on you at the first opportunity your back was turned.
If he had no ammunition to make your life unpleasant, he'd either go through your desk or would simply make something up which would be shared round the workplace. He brought several colleagues' careers to a juddering halt simply because he thought they looked "gay" or if he perceived them as a threat of any kind. If they weren't bullied out of the firm, he'd plant evidence of wrongdoing.
The trouble was, he held a somewhat senior position of trust with the firm.
We fell out.
Fearing a possible tribunal hearing, one of the bosses brokered a compromise and I duly received a simpering apology, which was accepted. All was forgiven, everything was forgotten.
Being a particularly hot summer, this chap would lazily saunter off outside for a cigarette break every couple of hours, leaving his unwashed coffee mug on the kitchen worktop while he smoked. For three months of summer this continued.
Being a particularly hot summer, I was blessed with an array of unsavoury substances to liberally smear round the rim of the coffee cup. For three whole months I had to ensure that any outward display of smirking was curtailed.
( , Thu 11 Dec 2008, 13:24, 3 replies)
Chap I once worked with was the most snivelling, insincere individual it has ever been my misfortune to meet. You know the type, he'd greet with a simpering "Hello mate!" first thing in the morning, before turning the knife on you at the first opportunity your back was turned.
If he had no ammunition to make your life unpleasant, he'd either go through your desk or would simply make something up which would be shared round the workplace. He brought several colleagues' careers to a juddering halt simply because he thought they looked "gay" or if he perceived them as a threat of any kind. If they weren't bullied out of the firm, he'd plant evidence of wrongdoing.
The trouble was, he held a somewhat senior position of trust with the firm.
We fell out.
Fearing a possible tribunal hearing, one of the bosses brokered a compromise and I duly received a simpering apology, which was accepted. All was forgiven, everything was forgotten.
Being a particularly hot summer, this chap would lazily saunter off outside for a cigarette break every couple of hours, leaving his unwashed coffee mug on the kitchen worktop while he smoked. For three months of summer this continued.
Being a particularly hot summer, I was blessed with an array of unsavoury substances to liberally smear round the rim of the coffee cup. For three whole months I had to ensure that any outward display of smirking was curtailed.
( , Thu 11 Dec 2008, 13:24, 3 replies)
The correct term for mug terrorism is ...........
......Skiffing and its a particularly prevalent sport in the world of young soldiers and arsehole junior officers!
One of my previous bosses had knob cheese, snot and a sweaty arse crack finger run around the rim of his. I still continue to skiff CNUTS who get on my tits and my boss, being ex-RAF knows all too well to only ask me to make the brews if he's dropped me in for a couple of extra late shifts.
( , Thu 11 Dec 2008, 19:25, closed)
......Skiffing and its a particularly prevalent sport in the world of young soldiers and arsehole junior officers!
One of my previous bosses had knob cheese, snot and a sweaty arse crack finger run around the rim of his. I still continue to skiff CNUTS who get on my tits and my boss, being ex-RAF knows all too well to only ask me to make the brews if he's dropped me in for a couple of extra late shifts.
( , Thu 11 Dec 2008, 19:25, closed)
nightly routine
take brief on hours of additional work from cunt boss - tiny tiny hands - yes ladies i know.
finish work.
piss in cunt bosses Celtic FC mug
peel back foreskin
apply liberal portion of spimf 'musk'around rim of mug
pop mug on draining board
go home
( , Fri 12 Dec 2008, 0:01, closed)
take brief on hours of additional work from cunt boss - tiny tiny hands - yes ladies i know.
finish work.
piss in cunt bosses Celtic FC mug
peel back foreskin
apply liberal portion of spimf 'musk'around rim of mug
pop mug on draining board
go home
( , Fri 12 Dec 2008, 0:01, closed)
The dirty fucker in question
Boasted openly that he'd pissed in various people's tea (including my own, allegedly) and on the boss's office chair.
( , Mon 15 Dec 2008, 15:16, closed)
Boasted openly that he'd pissed in various people's tea (including my own, allegedly) and on the boss's office chair.
( , Mon 15 Dec 2008, 15:16, closed)
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