Well...
Seeing as I have not spent my every waking hour sitting up straight in a hard wooden chair, fully clothed in hessian and incessantly droning the praises of a tyrannical mass-murdering rapist in the sky, I should imagine that my ticket to Hell is well and truly in the celestial post.

Still, difficult to view this as a loss. I imagine the entire population of Heaven to be around two hundred, every one of them pale, nervous and bored out of their fucking gourds. Forever.

Edit:

My son was conceived in a church, now I come to think of it, by two unwed parents. No numerical birthmarks on the boy, but I'll keep an eye out.
(Sir Harrington Titsmith disgraced himself on, Sat 13 Dec 2008, 20:22, Reply)