I had been living in a wonderful house,
But the 3 girls I was living with all got boyfriends or jobs in other cities, so the lease waa not renewed. I'd just taken a job at a cocktail bar and out of sheer luck one of the bar men there had a room free. It was cheap, and central and he seemed like a top bloke so I jumped at the chance to move in. He was a brilliant housemate, helped me move in, waived my first months rent while I got some furniture (going from furnished to unfurnished) and I settled in. It was a bit raucous there, we were young and flush on tips and worked irregular hours so it became a bit of a party house.
This was fine by me, however, the other bloke that lived there was a little odd. He was friendly enough, but mostly kept to himself, didn't moan about me and the other guy partying late, but was very adamant no one ever went in his room. Again, seems fine. However, about a month after I moved in (and as I found out only 6 weeks after Mr. "Stay out of my room" moved in) the house started to stink. We could not figure out what it was. We weren't the tidiest people, and the kitchen was far from spotless so we started with a big clean, thinking it might be some food down the back of a cupboard or a dead mouse somewhere.
Nothing, and the smell just got worse. We all 3 tried everything, we cleaned carpets, we washed curtains and even complained to the council in case it was the drains out front. We confronted neighbours and nothing did the trick.
Then, one weekend the man whose room was out of bounds went away, leaving strict instructions we were not to go in his room. Well, that weekend we had a party after work as normal, and one of the other guys asked to stay, instead of putting him on the couch we thought we'd just let him sleep in the empty room that sir "private space" had told us to stay out of. We push the door open and are suddenly all paralysed by the horrific stink. All of a sudden the source of the smell is discovered. In the corner of the room is a big pile of towels that look to be utterly soaked and slightly yellow brown. The door was quickly slammed, spare sheets were tucked under the door to keep the smell out and the party quickly petered out.

Housemate returns some point on Monday and is clearly upset as he rings the bar straight away to ask why there's a sheet tucked under his door, screaming blue murder about us trespassing and breaking trust and being terrible people. After a brief shouting match, where I tried to make the point that his make shift toilet was horrific to say the least, phones were slammed down with promises of retribution. I get home around 8 and it looks like housemate of the yellow lagoon is packing up to move out.
Turns out that his reason for doing it was that our parties were intimidating, and that he was too scared to go across the hall to the bathroom. When asked why he didn't say anything during the two weeks we all industrially cleaned the house together, he said he thought we'd be angry, and frankly he'd got used to the smell. When asked why he never cleaned it up, he said the smell was his way of getting his own back on us for having too much fun.
I saw him a couple of times after that, but he soon stopped hanging out in the places we did when the story got around.

Tl:Dr A fucking killer whale moves in and says racist stuff about your mother.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 12 Mar 2015, 22:09, 6 replies)

i've had it up to here with killer whales saying shit about my mum

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 13 Mar 2015, 9:18, closed)

"Gosh, that music is a bit raucous! Better shit in my own room then!

(McChinaman banned, Fri 13 Mar 2015, 9:21, closed)

he was a true hero.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 13 Mar 2015, 10:17, closed)

Is this a metaphor for /talk and QOTW?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 13 Mar 2015, 13:25, closed)

You were working as a waitress at a cocktail bar?

(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Sat 14 Mar 2015, 13:37, closed)

well that much is true.

(kitescreech still here, Sun 15 Mar 2015, 6:44, closed)