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A Customer Just Explained

his e-mail address is [email protected]

he spelled it and then explained, 'fearless, as in, no fear'.

thanks.


These people have guns

Snippet of e-mail from customer:

"I'm in the U.S. military in Germany and the only way stuff can ship to and from here is through USPS. Your online form did not accept AE as a valid state in the US. Is there any other way I can get this (product)replaced?"

The answer?

in the question perhaps?

Armed and dangerous, credited with the responsibility and decision skills to make life and death choices about who to shoot at, yet cannot master a basic skill like, oh, i dont know, figuring out Germany is not in the United States.

Freedom, Democracy, the Future, what hope?

I'm never having children.

my reply (as if),

Dear Sir,

thank you for your e-mail, oh yes and liberating us from Hitler.

Since then things have really perked up around here (Europe).

Not only can we get McDonalds in all of the larger, medium, smaller and provincial backwater towns, motorways, petrol stations and supermarkets but we can afford to wear Nike shoes, levis jeans, chew bubblegum, drive drag racers and watch Will Smith saving the world from robots and aliens again and again.

And double bonus for you sir, some of the larger, expansionist US corporations have deemed fit to provide us with labour in airless bunkers dotted about the place, like in Ireland where an entire generation has learned the joy of telephony.

One of these mighty benevolent American giants is UPS, another is DHL, both of whom deliver to, you guessed it - Germany.

Hurrah and Felicitations sir.

Your (product) is winging its way to you as we speak, not literally of course. Since the fall of the Ottoman Empire, people round here have stopped traveling by magic carpet. Such a shame you weren't around to liberate us from them too.

Kind Regards,
(bazmandublin, Wed 12 Jan 2005, 17:00, Reply)