I hurt my rude bitsSpent all day with a sore bum, went to the loo to check it out and found blood in my pants. Not good. Piles? Checked in the shower and pulled a staple from my arse. Serves me right for leaving an old pencil case in my underwear drawer. BTW: On relating this story to a friend they said, "some people will do anything for a prick up their bottom."
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rob, Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:00)
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Plastic RingI was aged 10 and jumping around on one of those space hoppers with the plastic ring around them that you stand on. My Mum shouted to me from the Caravan..(the shame) and I miss judged a jump.. falling over.. The aforementioned plastic ring is about the same width as my arse crack and painfully inserted itself there. My Mother spent some time that evening rubbing Savlon into my grazed posterior.
On another note... It was around the same that I sat down on some greenheart wood that my father had in the garden (it's a hard wood treated with arsenic to preserve it to be used in docks/ports). I got splinters all over my arse and laid on the floor while my Mum took the tweezers to my bum... you have to get the splinters out or you get blood poisoning from the arsenic. Most painful experience of my life.. and that's just the embarassment.
(, Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:42, Reply)
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