I hurt my rude bits
Spent all day with a sore bum, went to the loo to check it out and found blood in my pants. Not good. Piles? Checked in the shower and pulled a staple from my arse. Serves me right for leaving an old pencil case in my underwear drawer. BTW: On relating this story to a friend they said, "some people will do anything for a prick up their bottom."
( , Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:00)
Spent all day with a sore bum, went to the loo to check it out and found blood in my pants. Not good. Piles? Checked in the shower and pulled a staple from my arse. Serves me right for leaving an old pencil case in my underwear drawer. BTW: On relating this story to a friend they said, "some people will do anything for a prick up their bottom."
( , Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:00)
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bloody BMXs
a couple of years ago (i was 12/13ish)and me and a couple of friends were walking to another friends house when we saw an old BMX in a skip.
it was obviously there because it seemed to be made of razors and was lacking a saddle.
despite it being practically made of death we managed to lift it from the skip without too much hassle.
once we got it out no one dared ride it down the hill to our friends house. due to the fact that all my friends were scaredy shit wankers and i was not, i chose to ride it down the hill and, hopefully prove how great i was.
about half way down i hit a bump. nothing big, just enough to bruise my arse on the pipe where the saddle should have been. seeing how i wasnt going to make it all the way down without hurting myself i decided to stop.
but, as i slowed down, the front wheel stuck in a pot-hole and i fel, crotch first, into the bit the handle bars are joinded onto.
this would have been o.k if the afor mentiond bit wasn't a mangled peice of sharp metal.
i managed to hobble down to my friends house with my ball sack ripped open and the consfeeling that my balls were going to pop out. i fainted outside my friends house and all i can remember from then on is my friends mom saying,not very reasuringly, " i'm sure they'll be ably to save one of them at least"
i got to the hospital alright though and spent two weeks off school with giant bollocks.
Happy ending/ my friends told me afterwords that as they were putting me in the ambulance some tarmp kid ran of with the bmx, and they said that they had died.
( , Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:54, Reply)
a couple of years ago (i was 12/13ish)and me and a couple of friends were walking to another friends house when we saw an old BMX in a skip.
it was obviously there because it seemed to be made of razors and was lacking a saddle.
despite it being practically made of death we managed to lift it from the skip without too much hassle.
once we got it out no one dared ride it down the hill to our friends house. due to the fact that all my friends were scaredy shit wankers and i was not, i chose to ride it down the hill and, hopefully prove how great i was.
about half way down i hit a bump. nothing big, just enough to bruise my arse on the pipe where the saddle should have been. seeing how i wasnt going to make it all the way down without hurting myself i decided to stop.
but, as i slowed down, the front wheel stuck in a pot-hole and i fel, crotch first, into the bit the handle bars are joinded onto.
this would have been o.k if the afor mentiond bit wasn't a mangled peice of sharp metal.
i managed to hobble down to my friends house with my ball sack ripped open and the consfeeling that my balls were going to pop out. i fainted outside my friends house and all i can remember from then on is my friends mom saying,not very reasuringly, " i'm sure they'll be ably to save one of them at least"
i got to the hospital alright though and spent two weeks off school with giant bollocks.
Happy ending/ my friends told me afterwords that as they were putting me in the ambulance some tarmp kid ran of with the bmx, and they said that they had died.
( , Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:54, Reply)
« Go Back