Dont ever climb trees!
Aged about 11, I was daring and naive to say the least. Away on holiday at my Grandad's holiday home in Ireland, me and the neighbour decided to climb the trees at the end of the garden.

These trees were tall, Probably about 40ft high, and we were having a whale of a time at about 35ft up.

Out of no-where the wind decides it wants to join us and starts blowing a gale, so there's me and my friend frantically trying to climb down these dangerously swaying trees.

Cue crappy trainers that mothers buy children missing the branch I was climbing down onto, branch on other foot breaking and me falling.

On the way down, I rotate twice, a move any skydiver would be impressed with at such low altitude, cracking my dumplings on many branches.

Now you would think this would be bad enough, but at the bottom of the tree was a wire fence and an old rotting pallet leant up against the wire fence (the things made from wood that you move around with forklift trucks)

I landed straddling this pallet which proceded to disintergrate into thousands of tiny splinters, though not enough so that my feet touched the ground.

The wire had run up one side of my leg giving me the worst bruise and cut i had ever seen, and the splintered pallet embedded itself in not only my inner thighs, but the aforementioned dumplings.

I spend hours pulling them out and that was as painful as the original accident.

Apologies for length but that evening it was inverted.
(stevio is on the prowl for a girlfriend!, Fri 14 Jul 2006, 10:54, Reply)