I hurt my rude bitsSpent all day with a sore bum, went to the loo to check it out and found blood in my pants. Not good. Piles? Checked in the shower and pulled a staple from my arse. Serves me right for leaving an old pencil case in my underwear drawer. BTW: On relating this story to a friend they said, "some people will do anything for a prick up their bottom."
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rob, Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:00)
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Baby oil and genitalsNot me (of course) but a friend, who for obvious reasons I don't want to embarass should he ever read this board, so let's call him 'Dyllan Keller'.
A marvellous story he regaled us with in high school, that involved one frisky teenager, a shower, and a bottle of baby oil.
Said teenager was happily turning japanese in the shower when through a stroke (or several strokes) of genius, he decided that the baby oil would serve as the perfect lubricant between clenched fist and todger.
What might have been a good idea at the time led to slight irritation of the pubic area before moving quickly onto unholy inflammation and the inability to urinate for three days.
I'll never forget the look on his face as he revisited the events and implored me never to make the same mistake.
What's funnier is the eventual trip to the doctor wasn't even the most embarassing he's had... still. Lesson learnt.
(, Sun 16 Jul 2006, 13:00, Reply)
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