I hurt my rude bitsSpent all day with a sore bum, went to the loo to check it out and found blood in my pants. Not good. Piles? Checked in the shower and pulled a staple from my arse. Serves me right for leaving an old pencil case in my underwear drawer. BTW: On relating this story to a friend they said, "some people will do anything for a prick up their bottom."
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rob, Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:00)
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Never accept a takey of a crap bike rider!I've never claimed to be a good bike rider. Infact i'm a terrible one and to this day, i can't hop up onto a kerb (how embarrassing!)
So me and my mate are aged 12 or so and bored in the summer hols. "I know! Lets give each other takeys on your bike! GENIUS!!"
Off we ride with me pedalling and my friend positioned on the tip of the seat in front of me. I failed to inform her that i couldn't do the aformentioned 'kerb-hop' but i gave it a bash anyway.
I hit the kerb at lightning speed and my pal flies forward off the seat and feels the thud of her lady bits hitting the bike frame. One shattered pubic bone and three weeks in the hospital with her traumatized mother wailing "OH MY GOD!! They think she'll never be able to have kids"*
I never did confess that it wasn't entirely an accident
*This theory was rubbished approximatly three years later when the local baghead knocked her up!
(, Mon 17 Jul 2006, 20:03, Reply)
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