I Hurt My Rude Bits, AgainMy commute to work was made excellent the other day when I saw a motorcyclist try to ride on the pavement to avoid a traffic queue, lose control, fall off and land bollock-first on a concrete bollard. He was fine, eventually – but tell us your tales of the old blinding agony to the gentleman's or gentlewoman's area.
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 7 Mar 2013, 12:50)
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So I had an aching left bollockand I naturally assumed the worst, so I went to see my GP. He didn't even examine me, saying that it didn't sound like cancer, I was the wrong age for it and I'd feel a lump long before I had any pain. He suggested it was epididymitis caused by an infection and suggested waiting a week or so to see if it went away.
Somewhat reassured, I went away but the ache didn't subside. A couple of weekends later, I was thinking about going back to the GP while riding my bike on a rough road. Looking down, it all fell into place, if you'll excuse the pun.
Yes, my new oh-so-stylish cycling shorts weren't cut tight enough in the groinal region, and I could actually see the outline of my left gonad bouncing up and down on the nose of the saddle. Thinking back, I realised that the problem had only started when I bought the shorts, and the ache was only there for a day or so after wearing them each time. Shorts went in bin. Bollock stopped aching.
The moral; choose the tightest lycra that doesn't actually cut off the blood supply to your legs. Your crown jewels will thank you for it.
(, Thu 7 Mar 2013, 20:02, 3 replies)
Isn't great when one of our health professionals decides to play the odds (with your life) rather than do anything resembling their job.Hats off to the NHS.
Wrong age? Testicular cancer rates grow rapidly from puberty and peak at 25 to 30. Are you 80 or 10?
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Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Thu 7 Mar 2013, 20:54,
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^ thisYour GP is fucking shit. Mine got me an appointment up the hospital within two weeks even though he couldn't feel the lump himself, because he recognised that it wasn't his area of expertise and it's better to play safe on these things.
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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 7 Mar 2013, 21:07,
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I once went to the GP to discuss having an AIDS test...after hearing disturbing rumours about a recent partner.
His advice was not to have a test, on the grounds that "It would only make you worry."
Breathtaking. I changed GP. The rumours turned out to be untrue.
(, Fri 8 Mar 2013, 10:26, closed)
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