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This is a question Accidental innuendo

Freddy Woo writes, "A woman I used to work with once walked into a car workshop to get her windscreen replaced, and uttered the immortal line, "Have you seen the size of my crack?"

What innuendos have you accidentally walked into? Are you a 1970s Carry On film character?
Extra points for the inappropriateness of the context

(, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:05)
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You want to do WHAT??
Not so long back I was working on a production where the load-in had been crap, the venue was shit, we were under-staffed, it was turning into the job from Hell. We worked through the night and as the appointed show-time neared, everyone was mucking in, taping cables down and tidying up.

I was on hands and knees picking up rubbish and debris from the stage, dumping it into a large cardboard box, when the agitated client decided to show some solidarity and piled in with a dustpan and brush.

After a couple of minutes, she had filled the dustpan, and came over to where I was, head down and arse in the air :

"Can I put this in your dirtbox?" she trilled.

Bearing in mind we were literally minutes from the show call, and the client was extremely snooty, I bit my lip. Hard.

In slo-mo, I could see my boss' face pop up over her shoulder with a look of horror, he knew I wouldn't be able to resist that one. However, difficult though it was, I was in control, by a hair's breadth.

Then I heard from behind me a loud rasping from a colleague who had also realised the folly of laughing at the client, and was so clenched up he had farted.

The floodgates opened, both of us collapsed, and the boss had to whisk the bewildered client away. He told her we were delirious from lack of sleep!
(, Tue 17 Jun 2008, 13:31, 4 replies)
^clicks^
Almost spat coffee all over my screen and guffed at the same time...
(, Tue 17 Jun 2008, 13:36, closed)
A friend of mine
hadn't cleaned her car for a long time, and it was covered in mud. Until another friend used her finger to write in the mud;

Anyone want a ride in Louise's Dirt Box?

Nice.
(, Tue 17 Jun 2008, 13:38, closed)
@bert
so did anyone ride in her dirtbox?
(, Tue 17 Jun 2008, 13:56, closed)
Haha, I've been waiting for you to furnish us with a gem!
This really needs an "I fucking love this" button =)
(, Tue 17 Jun 2008, 14:12, closed)

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