Domino's pizza
More of a pedant/robot than a jobsworth but.......

Well, six pints the worse one Friday afternoon, pick up the phone and dial Domino's Macclesfield branch.

Buffoon, for that is what it should read on his name tag, answers....

Buffoon: "Hello Domino's"
Me:" Hello, can I order a cheesey garlic bread and a large pizza with ham, onions and spicy beef?"
Buffoon:"No we're shut."
Me:" Why did you pick up the phone?"
Buffon:"I have to."
Me: "You cock."

I put the phone down and, 10 seconds later the chimp is on the phone again.
Buffoon: "Did you just call me a cock?"
Me: "Yes."
Buffoon: "Why don't you come down here and tell me to my face?"

OK, sez I, the primate not realising I am drinking with Phil the body builder in the Bate Hall, literally 30 seconds stagger from Dominos.

Queue much embaraasment when two six footers turn up and the pus and colour drain from the acne on the little turd's face as we attempt to kick the door in.

Anyway, I would like to apologise to Tony, the manager, who is now a friend of mine, for threatening to disembowel his jobsworth staff. I may have over-reacted slightly, but his twuntish employees had twice previously brought me a pizza which had been transported on it's side so it was concertina-ed and all the toppings had fallen off. And there was hair in one of them.

When challenged, they said it must have been one of my own hairs that had fallen off. As I have short brown hair, I immediately checked to see if any shoulder length ginger ones had mysteriously sprouted from my bonce. F*ck me, I couldn't find a single one. W*nkers.

Domino's Pizza-Anagram for "Sh*t food badly prepared and sloppily served". (In German, maybe?)
(mashman99, Mon 16 May 2005, 16:15, Reply)