A mate and I
were looking after this little kid for a friend of ours. The trouble was, she was beautiful, she had lovely, golden hair, deep brown eyes, cute little legs and a smell that would invoke a perfectly natural reaction in any man.
Both my friend and I, being that way inclined, decided to take advantage of the situation. I grabbed her by the head and forced my throbbing member deep inside her gorgeous little mouth, while my partner in crime took her forcibly from behind.
Without doubt, it was some of the best sex either of us had ever had.

So, chickenlady, thanks for lending al and I your goat.

:D
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 9:14, 18 replies)

Nice work
Not even half nine, and I'm laughing!
( Cawl, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 9:19, closed)

Frankly,
I'm disappointed that al hasn't posted something similar to this already.

EDIT Oh, and good mornings!
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 9:23, closed)

Fair point.
*shrugs*
God-damn, this is a dull qotw for me, and it's a long time until Thursday afternoon.

*listens to Tomahawk*

Oh, and good morning to you too!
( Cawl, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 9:28, closed)

My poor little Kitty
She'll never be the same again.


*EDIT* The goat is called Kitty. I'm not bringing a cat into this.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 10:17, closed)

You can't fuck
A cat!

They a) Scratch like a motherfucker and b) Their eyes pop out when you stick it in.

/Tone lowered.
( Cawl, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 10:21, closed)

you two
are banned from all farmyards and the 50 mile radius around them.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 10:26, closed)

@chcb
Er... That means I need to move house... Can I live with you?
( Cawl, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 10:28, closed)

@CHCB
Quiet you! (and good morning Mrs Chickenlady and Mrs CHCB)

*dons diguise*

@Kaol, I think she meant al and I, unless you've been a-bumming the goats too...?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 10:29, closed)

@Burt
Shhh!
I'm gonna get free housing with a fantastic lady...
( Cawl, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 10:30, closed)

Cats? No problem.
With enough duck tape, even an average sized tabby won't split too much.
(osok Rebel without a clue, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 11:14, closed)

*Puts head in hands*
I wish I'd never brought my cat into this nasty business.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 11:19, closed)

Ah!
I hadn't thought of duck tape.

Surely that's just like filling a pint glass with roughly-minced steak though?
( Cawl, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 11:20, closed)

^Kaol
Or removing the central sausage from a catering size tin. Ahem.

Just think of the sound effects, though...

"MeeeeeeYOOOOOOWWWWWL......MMMEEEEEEEYYYOOOOWWL......MMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOWWWWWLLLL...'Pop'.....mmmmmmmmmyyyooowwwll..."
(osok Rebel without a clue, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 11:24, closed)

^^ THAT
Was beautiful.
Just when I thought it was over... *pop* mweeeaaahhhhhh...

Fantastic.
( Cawl, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 11:28, closed)

Too far
Please someone hand me the mind bleach so I can get the image out of my head.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 11:32, closed)

*hands mindbleach*
*realises too late that it's mixed with the blood and seed of a powerful cat-raping*
( Cawl, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 11:36, closed)

Aaarrrgggghhhhh!!!!!!!!
Ta.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 11:38, closed)

A pleasure,
As always.
( Cawl, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 11:39, closed)