you can't take me anywhere!
picture the scene: a beautiful summer's day, a picturesque church and the entire monkey family dolled up for the joint christening of 2-year-old smash monkey and newly arrived baby monkey. mummy and daddy monkey, both beaming with pride, stand beside the font, their simian offspring in their arms. all is going splendidly. that is, until mummy monkey hands little smash monkey to the vicar to be christened. as the vicar tries to mark little me with holy water, i decide to scream all over the church "NOOOOOOOOO! i've already HAD a bath today!"

31 years later, mum still hasn't forgiven me.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 21 Apr 2008, 22:26, Reply)