Dear Debbie
I realise you are trying to move on with your life now that we are apart, but I felt it would be kindest if you heard this from me rather than finding out about things "on the grape vine" as it were. You will be glad to know that I have managed to sell the house, despite the shithole state you and your vile offspring left it in, and for a small profit, which helped towards the huge debts you left me. I have also re homed your dog, the one you begged me for even though I hate dogs and never ever wanted one. He is, apparently, very happy in his new home with people who care about him and don't just leave his shit all over the garden for me to tread in.
I know you will find this hard to believe, but I now have a very lovely girlfriend, despite your assurances that no one would ever look at me again. A girlfriend who knows how to wash up and do hoovering, which means I don't have to do all the house work like I used to when we were together, which I found quite a chore, especially as I was working 12 hour days, though I do realise you were very busy watching "Loose Women" every day and then telling me how they think all blokes have affairs and therefore I must have been unfaithful to you. Incredibly, despite your assurances to me to the contrary, some women do like sex. and with the light on. and not just in the missionary position. and we do enjoy this more than once a fortnight. Sometimes we do it for 4 or 5 hours. She enjoys all the things that you told me were "Disgusting" which was a surprise.
I am sure you and Colin will be very happy together with his lovely money
Take care and try not to get run over by any buses

With no love whatsoever

Vinnegar Strokes
(Vinegar strokes Should know better on, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 13:27, 1 reply)

I am happy for you.
(Surfeit, Wed 10 Mar 2010, 16:32, closed)