Lies I told on my CVI've not had to lie on my CV (resumé for all you 'merkins) for a while, but way back when I was a teenager and C was a cool programming language, I listed it as one of my skills.
My new boss was remarkably nice about me spending my first week's employment reading a "how to program in C" book.
(
chthonic, Thu 6 Jul 2006, 15:55)
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Talented IndividualsJust before leaving part-time job to start a proper grown-up job, we had great fun looking through the raft of application forms that came in, applying for my soon-to-be-vacated position.
The other members of staff informed me that it was always an "utter bunch of tinks" that applied there. Whilst there were a few exaggerations to worry us, it was the remorseless honesty that was perhaps the most alarming. These fuckers should take heed of this board. Examples of responses include:
Full address : "Mum's House, (Something) Road"
Postcode:"Henry"
Reason for Leaving Previous Job: "Saveer Post Natel Depresion"
Reason for Leaving Previous Job: "Caught borrowing money from till" (Obviously the word borrowing had been changed from stealing, cos that sounds much better...)
Previous Employment: "Making tea for my Gran"
and my own personal favourite
Previous Job Responsibilities: "Putting Rolls on shelf"
Total number of applications recieved: 27
Total number of interviewees: 4
They were all dead serious applicants, most of whom had applied when I got hired. Looks like I beat off stiff competition.
(, Wed 12 Jul 2006, 14:29, Reply)
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