The two that spring to mind
Love: English mustard. It pisses all over every other mustard in the world. Dijon? Go fuck you self. German? I want mustard not a brown paste with a hint of mustard and last but not least that American shite in the squeezey yellow bottle, it's bland like Mellow Birds coffee. Mustard for people who don't like mustard.

Hate: Sorry for unleashing Simon Cowell & Piers Morgan into the world they are terrible cunts
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 4 Oct 2013, 14:02, 8 replies)

Beef
is not beef unless your nasal passage and eyes are burning due to a generous slathering of colmans.
(GirlOfTheWorld, Fri 4 Oct 2013, 14:49, closed)

Squeezy mustard goes quite well with american style hotdogs and plastic cheese

(AWESOMEB0T meddling prick, Fri 4 Oct 2013, 15:06, closed)

And sweet, grainy, German mustard goes well with weisswurst.
Not to mention cheese.
English mustard on roast beef/gammon, but there's no point being a condiment nazi.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 4 Oct 2013, 15:09, closed)

I have to agree
Although English mustard is the superior condiment there is a time and a place for other, inferior mustards.
There is, however, no time or place for Cowell or Morgan. At least we haven't inflicted Littlejohn onto the rest of the world. I think if we had then we cold have been dragged to the Hague.
( monkeyboyalpha jumping on the bandwagon since, Sun 6 Oct 2013, 13:20, closed)

Spot on!
...on both points.
(dchurch bah, Fri 4 Oct 2013, 15:11, closed)

It'll come out if you soak it first.

( Infidel , shit and wrong, Fri 4 Oct 2013, 15:30, closed)

Agreed. English mustard is clearly the best in the world.
Far superior to its foreign counterparts. I quite like it with sausages.
Can we add Jeremy Kyle to the list of insufferable cunts?
(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Thu 10 Oct 2013, 11:14, closed)