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This is a question Midlife Crisis

I've hit my forties, and my midlife crisis has manifested itself in old band T-shirts and a desire to go on camper van holidays. How has it hit you, or - if you are still a youngling - your elders?

(, Thu 2 May 2013, 11:55)
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Crisis? What crisis?
Things I have noticed now that I've passed 40...

I have tinnitus.
I make groaning noises when I get up from a seat, or out of my bed, or out of a car after short journeys as well as long, and it takes me a couple of minutes to walk without a limp.
My dad turned 70, and for the first time I thought "Blimey, he's proper old now".
I feel comfortable wearing a suit jacket with jeans.
I can't go to a trendy hair stylist in Soho any more.
I'll still go to a cocktail bar when the pubs shut, but I won't go to a nightclub and dance.
I don't want to make any more new friends - I have enough now.
My married-with-kids friends use me to escape their humdrum lives by always finding excuses for me not to visit them in their family situation, and the blokes have to build up brownie points to come out on the lash and always want to stay over.
I sometimes avoid bustling trendy bars because they're too busy or noisy or it'll take too long to get a drink, so instead I go to dingy boozers full of old men where I know I can get a seat.
People in their early twenties look really young. I mean really, really young - like they're young teenagers. I also refer to them as "kids".
I don't have FOMO (fear of missing out) any more - I don't look with envy at people queuing up outside nightclubs, or drunkenly trying to pull each other in bars. I say things like "It's their time now..." to myself in my head.

And, do you remember in almost every decent nightspot there's an old geezer leaning up against the bar who looks like he doesn't belong and that he's only there to perve at the young girls? I've come to realise that's now me...

...but even with all of that, I don't feel as old as I thought I would. I still act as though I'm still in my late-twenties/early-thirties.
(, Fri 3 May 2013, 17:08, 2 replies)
You tragic fucking spinster.

(, Fri 3 May 2013, 17:58, closed)
40?
Try mid-50s. The old knees go off like antique pistols.
(, Sat 4 May 2013, 16:59, closed)

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