jasper
jasper was a cat who turned up at our house one day and made himself at home. despite the fact that she ordinarily dislikes any animal she's not currently eating, my mum really took to jasper and was the one who named him.
i, on the other hand, did not like him at all. he had creepy eyes and would stare at me as if to say "yeah, be afraid, i'm gonna eat your face off while you sleep."
this furry bundle of ginger malevolence slept in the kitchen in his own little bed. the kitchen door was closed tightly every night, to stop him prowling around the house and shitting behind the couch. at this time, my brother was going through a phase of klepto-annoyance, meaning he would nick my stuff just to piss me off. because of this, i had a lock on my bedroom door and locked it every night before i got into bed.
so, that's 2 locked doors between me and the cat. my window was closed tightly, too. how, then, did i wake up to find the evil little bastard sitting on my chest, staring at me and purring like a furry rapist? i flew out of bed and threw the little fucker out on to the landing, locking the door(again) behind him.
this happened three times, with nobody able to explain how this four-legged houdini of evil was doing it.

jasper left as mysteriously as he'd arrived, simply disappearing one day, never to return. i wasn't sorry to see him go.

i fucking hated that cat.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 3 Feb 2013, 14:13, 3 replies)

Jasper the creepy ghost?

( Ghoti Fingers, Sun 3 Feb 2013, 20:16, closed)

jasper the evil cat

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 4 Feb 2013, 13:44, closed)

To follow a theme so far on this QOTW - was that the day you had 'rabbit' pie for dinner?
(Benzyl, Wed 6 Feb 2013, 21:13, closed)