It didn't need Sherlock to work it out..
Not me but a friend..

I'm from an astonishingly boring area of Sussex which probably explains why they really get behind any local celebrities. The next towns raison d'etre was none other than Arthur Conan Doyle. A splendid bronze statue was erected in his honour, featuring the man himself looking dapper in suit and hat.
The other effect of this astonishingly boring area of Sussex was the heavy *heavy* drinking in the Uk's 3rd worst nightclub(Bugatti's for those interested). This lead to the usual japery, nothing serious. Until one night an acquittance took it too far.

He kept quiet about it so it came as a surprise when a friend who had idly picked up my mums copy of the local paper and spotted him. The CCTV installed in the town was of astonishing quality. They printed a full colour photo of Jack(for that was his name) laughing at Mr Conan Doyle, pulling his hat off, dancing with it and eventually departing with it. This was all immensely amusing.
I don't know the details of what happened to Jack, but I do remember that the hat was welded under Mr Conan Doyles arm after that and the response was the surprisingly swift after the article went out.

Length? About 22 inches around for a hat no?
(skgorsky, Mon 30 Apr 2012, 10:27, 5 replies)

I'm not very far from that boring Sussex town!
Not a hell of a lot to do there, no wonder the hat got stolen!
( SauronWibble I'll hold it, you lick it..., Mon 30 Apr 2012, 17:18, closed)

You illiterate fuck.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 30 Apr 2012, 20:08, closed)

Troll is trolling.
(skgorsky, Mon 30 Apr 2012, 23:17, closed)

"the response was the surprisingly swift after the article went out"
( 4Q just lurking, Tue 1 May 2012, 0:16, closed)

So you're illiterate AND you don't know what "troll" means.
You're a fucking catch and no mistake.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 1 May 2012, 7:50, closed)