Churchyard
Living in the East End is like taking your life into your hands everytime you step out of your front door, but sometimes I used to think I asked for the locals to try and rob me...

..Anyhew, the shortcut from the g/f's house to my flat took me through a very dark and spooky churchyard (St. Annes in Limehouse if you know it) and after a rather relaxed evening involving a few bottles of wine, I had to get home. As I'm walking I notice a shadow ahead, behind some gravestones and realise that some chav scumbag is going to try and suprise me and relieve me of my worldly posessions.

Needless to say I was less than shocked when the tracksuited twat jumped out from behind a grave shouting something in his native language - he seemed suprised at my lack of reaction and went for the traditional 'Got the time mate?' 'That's a nice watch - I'll 'av that' approach.
From what I remember - I think I saw red completely and ended up smacking the guys face into some victorian gravestone and telling my wouldbe mugger that unless he ran home there and then, I would personally bury him in that same grave... I can only assume that years of pent up rage and aggression from having to live amoungst the East End scum (combined with three bottles of Oddbin's finest) burst out - but I like to think I scared the little fecker witless...
( HSDriver was probably still at work on, Thu 15 Jun 2006, 22:04, Reply)