My first experience of porn
So there I am, aged 11, crawling through the woods with the Scouts when we come upon a big pile of magazines stuck into a tree. Risking losing the game by being seen, we stand up to knock them down.
They flutter down in a big heap - and behold, they are full of nudey ladies!
Crawling through the woods suddenly lost its appeal...
What was your first experience of porn?
( , Thu 25 Jan 2007, 15:29)
So there I am, aged 11, crawling through the woods with the Scouts when we come upon a big pile of magazines stuck into a tree. Risking losing the game by being seen, we stand up to knock them down.
They flutter down in a big heap - and behold, they are full of nudey ladies!
Crawling through the woods suddenly lost its appeal...
What was your first experience of porn?
( , Thu 25 Jan 2007, 15:29)
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Adventures in babysitting
When I was about fourteen I used to babysit for two boys down the road, both about nine years old.
One evening they were playing upstairs but were suspiciously quiet. I went to investigate and they were both crouched over an open drawer in their parents' bedside cabinet.
When I asked them what they were up to they looked extremely guilty and went downstairs. I had a look and there was an impressive collection of magazines - Razzles mainly.
At the bottom of the pile there was a plain brown envelope. I could feel my heart thumping, it couldn't be... I opened the envelope... Yup. The lady of the house kneeling on the very bed I was sitting on, smiling over her shoulder, blurry eyed, and a peeled banana protruding from her anus. It can't have been very ripe.
Anyway, well worth the shock I got when I heard two small accusing voices from the doorway asking exactly what I was up. I pray to God that they never investigated that drawer further than the top of the pile otherwise they'd feature in last week's qotw.
I saw the woman years later in the fruit and veg section of Waitrose and nearly fainted. Lock your drawers, chaps!
( , Thu 25 Jan 2007, 16:42, Reply)
When I was about fourteen I used to babysit for two boys down the road, both about nine years old.
One evening they were playing upstairs but were suspiciously quiet. I went to investigate and they were both crouched over an open drawer in their parents' bedside cabinet.
When I asked them what they were up to they looked extremely guilty and went downstairs. I had a look and there was an impressive collection of magazines - Razzles mainly.
At the bottom of the pile there was a plain brown envelope. I could feel my heart thumping, it couldn't be... I opened the envelope... Yup. The lady of the house kneeling on the very bed I was sitting on, smiling over her shoulder, blurry eyed, and a peeled banana protruding from her anus. It can't have been very ripe.
Anyway, well worth the shock I got when I heard two small accusing voices from the doorway asking exactly what I was up. I pray to God that they never investigated that drawer further than the top of the pile otherwise they'd feature in last week's qotw.
I saw the woman years later in the fruit and veg section of Waitrose and nearly fainted. Lock your drawers, chaps!
( , Thu 25 Jan 2007, 16:42, Reply)
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