I fear the reaper.
Part of my ear got shot off with a shotgun while clay pigeon shooting. It was my Dad who pulled the trigger. After a wee bit of plastic surgery, I have a normal (ish) ear again. That’s the last time I hold the fucking clay in the air for him and his drunken friends.
Got hit by a bus when pissed, (I was pissed, not the bus) bounced off it and landed on the bonnet of a metro. The couple who where in it were surprised to see my chubby face squashed against the windscreen. Only survived cus my body was so limp.
And the last one, I fell off a boat that was in a dry dock (i.e. on big stilts about 10 ft up from concrete) and landed on a 4inch metal bolt. It stuck out the side of my head. A mm deeper and it was bye bye boabmaster. As it was, it took a good 9 hours of surgery to remove. No lasting effects, though I have started to fight in my sleep.
Each time I’ve either been to stupid/ drunk to realise how close to death I have been. Not once have I “ floated” above myself, or seen a “white light”. I’m kinnda jealous. No life changing experience. Just stupid drunk stories. I’m just a bit of a twat really.I did think i heard GOD once,but it turned out to be Garry Barrlow hidding under my bed.
Length, you should be proud of it.
(Jeeves, Fri 26 Nov 2004, 12:22, Reply)